Battle Scars
by ZiggyGurl
Summary: She, like most Greasers, feels too violently. Self medication of alcohol is the easiest way to get through. Family & habit are the only ways to love her and most people are able to avoid that. Redone as of '07. OC is present but not normal. Alternate end.
1. Introduction

_**Chapter One: Introduction**_

**Notes: The first of the story starts out with nothing to do with the Outsiders, but soon enough they'll come in so stick with me. I'm a character writer so expect a lot of chapters that don't seem to have anything to do with the plot. **

_"Hey! Throw me a beer will ya?" someone screeched from the living room. _

"No, I won't. They're disgusting," A girl's voice answered as she entered the room.

"Yeah, you should talk kid, you drink more than I do," the first voice replied. It was the voice of a boy, who was sitting on the couch. He couldn't have been more than 18 or 19 but he looked like he'd lived life to the fullest.

"Shut up. That's a lie," the girl answered. She wasn't so old herself, younger than the boy, 17 at the oldest. She was on the short side at around 5'4". While she wasn't gorgeous she was sort of pretty with bright, laughing blue eyes and dark brown hair with reddish highlights that cascaded over her shoulders in waves. Her eyes were rather haunting, giving her the look of someone who has been through too much in a tiny ammount of time. The boy however, was a real looker and looked happy and well taken care of. He wasn't tall either, around 5'8" but he had a very handsome face with a defined jaw line and cheekbones and deep, sparkling brown eyes. His hair was wavy too and jet black.

Their arguing was playful, anyone would be able to see they never really argued. Before their conversation could go any furthur the phone rang. The girl removed herself from the couch where she had just perched less than a minute before, and entered the kitchen where the phone hung on the wall near the fridge.

"Hello? Aubrey here," she said into the black telephone.

"Miss Holloway?" the man on the other end asked.

"Yep, may I ask who is calling?" she said, putting on her best show of manners, as she didn't recognize the voice.

"This is Sheriff Brewer…there is no easy way to say this..." he answered in a husky voice, "but your parents have been in a car accident."

"Are they OK?" Aubrey asked with a short catch in her voice. She kept herself under control though, after all she hadn't cried since she was 7 years old.

"They are in critical condition. If you want to see them before they die you should probably head on to the hospital now" he answered her. Aubrey's throat closed up, she couldn't talk and she dropped the phone and slid down the wall, sobs were wracking her body but no tears were coming out of her eyes. The boy's previously merry eyes were wide in worry as he rushed to the phone.

"Hello?" he asked. "What did you do to her?"

"Who is this?" Sheriff Brewer asked.

"Tom Delaney" the boy answered.

"It's Sheriff Brewer…Aubrey's parents are in critical condition at the hospital. Bring her down here" and with that he hung up. Tom stared at Aubrey in shocked horror for a moment before he lifted her up and helped her walk out to the car.

--------------

_Less than a month later Aubrey found herself on a train on the way to Tulsa, Oklahoma to live with her cousins. _Her cousins were orphans as well, their parents had died less than five months before, ironically, in a car accident. She was happy to be going to see them, but not so much under the circumstances. The last time she'd seen them it had been for a funeral, their parents. The time before for her mother's divorce of her second step father (the one who'd just died was the third). She'd lived there when she was a child, however.

Aubrey's eyes were one of the telltale signs that her life hadn't been happy. Other signs were her scars. She had scars all over her body, but mostly on her arms and legs from where she'd been beaten badly. Those scars were from her first stepfather who used her as a punching bag. They'd lived in Tulsa then too. Right next door to the cousins she was moving in with now.

Her second stepfather had forced her mother, her sister, and her to move to New York when she was 7. In New York Aubrey hadn't been happy, but she'd had a friend who lived next door whom she loved greatly. The two of them had protected each other. When her stepfather allowed Aubrey's little sister to be killed to save his own skin Aubrey and her mother moved away abruptly, without Aubrey having a chance to even tell her beloved friend goodbye.

She had been fourteen when she moved back to Tulsa with her mother. They'd lived there barely 3 months when her mother got married for the fourth time. Her mother had never been able to get through life without a man, she was far too dependent. When she wasn't married she made Aubrey feel like she was the mother instead of the daughter. This stepfather was a loving man, who was extremely nice to both Aubrey and her mother. Unfortunately his job forced them to move off to Texas and leave Aubrey's cousins behind.

There the family had lived happily for almost 3 years before the accident. Now she was back to where she'd started, but without her mother.

----------------

_Sodapop Curtis sat at the train station with his eyes glued to the tracks in front of him. _Soon his cousin Aubrey would be there. Soda and Aubrey had always been very close, they even shared a birthday and they'd lived next door to each other the first 7 years of their lives. Soda, Aubrey, and Soda's best friend, Steve Randle, had been like the 3 musketeers in their earlier years. They were inseparable and they'd never been apart up until the year she left for New York. That was the year she forgot how to cry and the year they began to grow apart.

When she'd gotten back from New York she'd been hardened. She was still the same Aubrey he knew and loved, but she was too wise for her years, and she seemed less playful, and much less childish. Just when she was beginning to resemble her old self again she was ripped away from him and off to Texas.

Since then he'd seen her once, and that was on a terrible occasion. She'd come for his parents funeral. He hadn't said a word to her throughout that whole event, he felt bad for it now but then he'd been so upset and a bit angry that she hadn't been there for him when they died, even though he knew it wasn't her fault, that he could barely think straight through the whole ordeal.

Sodapop wasn't alone at the train station of course, his brothers Ponyboy, and Darry were there too. Ponyboy didn't have as many affectionate memories with Aubrey as Soda and Darry since she'd only been there a short time since he was old enough to remember. Darry and Aubrey had been close, yet not as close as she and Soda had been. Darry had been her protector, and was like her older brother.

Aubrey's mother and Soda's mom had been sisters. They were nothing alike in any way. Soda's mom had been wise and beautiful in a girl-next-door sort of way.

Aubrey's mother had been wild and exotically beautiful. She had never been able to sit still and hold to family life, and she'd never been that amazingly close with her kids, but Soda had liked her because she was easy to talk to and friendly like Aubrey.

Soda almost didn't notice when the train pulled up because he was so lost in thought. He barely noticed when a pretty little petite girl walked out of the train door. When she walked out Darry stood up and she ran to him and wrapped her arms around him. He hugged her back and smiled sadly at her.

She hugged Ponyboy almost as zealously and gave him a mischievous grin and a pinch on the cheek. "Look how much you've grown" she joked. She would seem happy to anyone who didn't know her that well, but Soda knew her inside and out whether he'd seen her recently or not, and he could tell that if she could cry she would be bawling at that moment. The pain from her parents deaths was just too fresh.

Finally she turned her attention to Soda. She looked at him in a shy way for a second, remembering perhaps how angrily he'd handled her at the funeral. But when he gave her one of his smiles she couldn't hold herself back and she flung herself at him, hugging him and squeezing him tightly. She kissed his cheek and ruffled his hair. He hugged and squeezed her just as tightly.

"Good to see ya Soda" she whispered.


	2. Johnny's Near Death Experience

_**Chapter Two: Johnny's Near Death Experience**_

**Note- Thank yous go to reviewers. **

_The house was absolutely silent._ At four o'clock in the morning this was only natural, but it was eery to Aubrey. Her house had always been fully awake at all hours. Her step-father, mother, and even Aubrey herself were always having people over. Sometimes it would be a hobo off of the streets, other times an old friend who was having a rough time at home. To keep herself from thinking too hard about the silence Aubrey sat on the bed, staring at the pictures on the walls. She'd seen them all a million times before. She'd slept in this room so many times before, but for some reason when she noticed a picture on the wall opposite from her, it was too much. The picutre featured two brightly smiling women. Something caught in her throat. The women had two children sitting in front of them, it was Soda and Aubrey and the women were their mothers. Tears began to build up in her eyes.

She had to grab ahold of herself or she was going to cry, she reminded herself, but it was too late. She burst into tears, rocking back and forth in sobs. She was sobbing so loud she thought the whole neighborhood would wake up. She couldn't control herself. Angry tears, guilty tears, pining tears, frustrated tears, and scared tears ran down her face. She was crying for all of the times she hadn't been able to.

After a couple of minutes she felt a pair of arms wrap around her tightly. She knew it was Soda without having to look at him. He hugged her tightly, without saying anything. She loved that about him, anyone else would be telling her that "everything would be alright" which could be a lie, or could be perfectly true. Nobody could see into the future, and for all they knew she could live a horrible life after that. Soda knew her far too well, and he kept his mouth shut and was just there for her, like he'd been so many times before, like he hadn't been there so many times in New York, so many times in Texas.

**Ponyboy's POV**

He stared through the open doorway and into the room. Soda and Aubrey were on the bed curled tightly into a ball, and Aubrey was sobbing her heart out. After a couple of minutes he could hear Soda's crying too. The sobs had brought him out of a deep slumber, that and the fact that Soda had moved out of bed. Darry was still sound asleep in his room.

This little crying spell took Ponyboy by surprise. He remembered the summer Aubrey and her mother had been in Oklahoma after leaving New York. Aubrey had accidently stabbed herself with a kitchen knife while she was cutting up some cucumbers for a salad. She'd bled for such a long time, and her face went a ghostly pale but she'd never shed a tear.

He remembered asking Soda about it later and he'd said "She's too hurt to cry. She's been like that. When they first got here she was real upset about her sister and she told me that it was like she forgot how to cry, and no matter how much she wanted to let it out she couldn't. One day she's gonna break down, and she's not gonna be able to take it any more," the answer had been too weird for Ponyboy then, but he could see what his brother meant now. Aubrey had hit a breaking point.

She was crying for everything that had happened over the years, every single time she'd wanted to cry.

**The Next Day - Narrator POV**

"Johnny!" a voice rang out throughout the house. The small black haired boy jumped back in fright as a girl flung herself at him, hugging and squeezing him until he was out of breath. He thought he'd die of fright for a moment there, but when the girl pulled away he recognized her at once. It was Aubrey Holloway, cousin to the Curtis's and Johnny's own personal supplier of heart-attacks.

"H-Hey Aub-bb-rey" Johnny said, still very shaky as he managed to back away from her and catch his breath. Her grin was contagious, and he smiled shyly.

"Long time no see" she said as she patted him on the back and lead him to the living room. It was empty.

"Yeah" he answered her, looking around the living room. "Where is everybody?"

"Darry had mandatory overtime today. He's going to work himself to death," Aubrey said, chattering away. She was much happier than Ponyboy had said she was. He was surprised. "Soda went to work too, and Ponyboy went off to..." but she stopped mid-sentence as someone flung themself at her, hugging her tightly.

"AUBREY!" the person shouted. Johnny realized it was Two-Bit. He swung her around, and then placed her back on the ground.

"Hi!" Aubrey squeaked.

"C'mere Dal, you've never met her before. This is Aubrey Holloway, she's Soda's cousin that he talks about all the time," Two-Bit said as if she wasn't cousins with Darry and Pony.

Aubrey turned around and stuck out her hand at Dallas. Then she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him.


	3. Wow

_**Chapter Three: Wow**_

**Note- I hate Word Pad with a passion. Please let me know about any grammatical, or spelling errors, or anything that just doesn't make sense. **

_'My god, he may look like a hood but why is she staring at him that hard?'_ Johnny thought to himself as he noticed how hard Aubrey was staring at Dallas. Then he realized maybe she was staring because she _liked_ the way he looked, and he blushed. That was when he realized Dallas was staring right back at her, like he'd never seen a pretty girl before in his life. Then something happened that was completely unexpected. Aubrey ran at Dallas, and grabbed him around the waist, hugging him tightly. Even more to Johnny's surprise Dallas hugged back! _'Wow' _Johnny was beginning to doubt his eyesight. He'd never seen anyone even attempt to hug Dallas Winston before, not even Sylvia (his girlfriend).

"DALLY!" Aubrey shrieked. Dallas was grinning like a cheshire cat and hugging her just as tightly. She kissed him on the cheek happily. At this Johnny actually rubbed his eyes in disbelief. He looked at Two-Bit worriedly, wondering if maybe he'd missed something, and saw that he looked just as confused as Johnny felt.

After a couple of minutes of hugging and chattering away happily Dallas must've realized what this looked like to Johnny and Two-Bit and he pulled away from Aubrey quickly, though he still had one arm wrapped around her. At this moment Johnny realized Soda and Ponyboy were home and they were standing in the doorway looking aghast.

"You, uh, know each other?" Soda asked, scratching his neck uncomfortably. Aubrey looked like she would've hugged him too if she wasn't entwined in Dallas.

"Know each other? Hell we spent 7 years together" Dally said slyly. Two-Bit cocked an eyebrow.

"When?" Ponyboy asked, the first time he'd spoken. It was Aubrey's turn to answer a question.

"When I moved to New York, remember that friend I talked about? The one who lived next door and everything? Well this is him!" She said patting Dallas on the chest happily.

Johnny was so surprised he felt like a breeze could send him reeling. All he'd heard about from Aubrey the summer she'd come back from New York was about how much she missed one of her friends who she loved to death, and who was so sweet even though he was growing up too fast. This didn't describe the Dallas he knew at all. Dallas he knew showed no signs of sweetness in any way.

"Wow," Two-Bit muttered. Once again, he expressed how Johnny felt perfectly.

"Are you serious?" Ponyboy asked. Dallas gave him a mean look and lit a cigarette, handing it to Aubrey and then lighting one for himself.

"Do you think she'd lie to ya?" He asked. Ponyboy shook his head.

"I guess not..." he muttered, as if he had no idea if she'd lie to him or not, but he didn't really feel like expressing that thought to Dallas.

**...Later...**

"Why didn't you ever tell me that guy's name was Dallas Winston?" Soda asked Aubrey as they did the dishes that night.

"I don't know. It never occurred to me, I guess. I was just too mixed up, ya know with my sister...dying and all," she murmured, sticking her hands into the hot, soapy water.

"I can't believe you both moved to the same place. Do you know how unlikely that is? Wow," he muttered.

"I know. Its scary. I thought I'd never see him again," she said with a laugh. After a moment she spoke again "He's different though now. Back in New York we didn't have anybody to take care of us except each other and he was always really nice to me," she paused to wipe a soap sud off of her eyebrow, "Even if he did have a bad temper. Here it's like he got too mean too quick" she finished with a sigh.

Somehow Soda couldn't ever imagine Dally as the one who protected Aubrey every night in New York, and the person she thought about when she didn't have anyone to turn to. Soda had always pictured someone who was always laughing, who never got mad. He couldn't have been any furthur off. It was even harder to imagine Dallas Winston loving someone...well besides Johnny maybe.

Darry however didn't seem in the least bit surprised that Dally could be the person she was always running on about. He'd just shrugged the news off and said, "I thought it might be."


	4. Moonlit Stroll

_**Chapter Four: Moonlit Stroll**_

**Note: This chapter is dedicated to _Mrs. Benji Madden_! Thank you MUCHLY for your reviews, and in response: Yes. Dally is drop dead gorgeous. **

**(Aubrey's POV)**

"Ugh, it's cold in here" I muttered to myself, rubbing my arms as I pulled the blanket up to my chin. I was having trouble sleeping in the dead quiet again. Well, maybe Tulsa isn't the quietest place, but once you're used to parties and car crashes regularly in Austin and New York anything else was eerily quiet. All I could hear was a sort of restless tapping outside, and finally my brain zeroed in on something, tapping. I rolled over to my side and looked out of the window. To the inexperienced there would be nothing strange about how the light from the streetlamps filtered through the dirty, foggy window, but to me it was a lifeline. I climbed out of bed as quietly as possible and pulled a jacket over my tank top. My pajama pants came down past my feet, so I pulled on some boots too. I opened the window, and it creaked loudly, I paused to listen and see if anyone had heard…nothing moved and I slid out of the open window, not closing it. It had always been a signal between Soda and I when we were kids and sneaking out regularly. I stumbled outside thinking vaguely, that it was even colder out of doors than inside and I wonderedif I should close the window to keep heat in. I shrugged it off though, thinking to myself _"They're asleep anyway with any luck." _I stood there for a moment and then reached down and knocked on the head of the boy crouching beside me. He sprang up.

"Hey kid," he said with a vague, grim grin and a drag from his cigarette.

"Same age as you," I argued softly.

"Few months younger," he shot back.

"Dammit," I muttered happily.

"Don't say that," he cautioned soberly.

"C'mon MOTHER lets take a walk," I said, afraid that our chattering would wake up someone (namely Ponyboy because Soda and Darry always slept like they were dead). As we wandered away from the small, tattered house I removed the cigarette from his mouth and took a long drag, then gave it back to him.

"It's been a while" Dally remarked in a softer voice than what was normal for him. By this time we were walking past Johnny's house, people were screaming inside. Dally let out a long sigh. "His parents make me sick."

"Yeah, they make me sick too. They're worse than…" I trailed off.

"Worse than what?" Dally asked.

"Nothing," I said quickly, maybe too quickly because it made Dally suspicious. I had been close to mentioning my first step-father, the unlovable man who found his daily joy in beating me senseless. Somehow, I felt like sharing that with Dallas would not be the best idea.

"What were you going to say?" he asked in a dangerously intimidating voice. I gave an involuntary shudder but quickly got over it. This Dally might have not have been the one I'd spent nights in an alley wrapped in newspaper with, but he used to be that Dally, and I didn't think he'd hurt me.

"Nothing," I said again. He didn't say anything for a minute and I thought he'd given up. I was wrong, even in my memories of younger Dally he'd never been one to give up so easily. After a while he spoke again.

"They been treating you okay?" he asked.

"Sure," I answered, not catching the look he gave me.

"Darry's not hitting you or anything is he?" he inquired. I stopped in my tracks, turned and looked at him, amazed.

"Gosh no!" I said, surprised. He looked a bit miffed.

"Just makin' sure," he said gruffly, beginning to walk again. I grabbed his wrist, anyone else would've turned to face me but Dally was too stubborn, so I had to walk around in front of him.

"I can take care of myself now. I've grown up since when we were 14." I told him. He threw his cigarette down and exhaled so that smoke left his mouth and nostrils in a cloud.

"I know," he said looking down, at the last orange light of his cigarette. We walked on again in silence, until at long last we reached the park. I hurried over to my favorite swing, and took a seat. He leaned against the post it was hanging on. Neither of us spoke, I was uncomfortable. _"Why am I uncomfortable with Dally?" _I questioned myself. Dally and I didn't have the almost psychic connection I shared with Soda. He was hard to read, I couldn't tell what he was thinking. After a while the tension was killing me and I spoke.

"I missed you," I mentioned, simply enough, not too much emotion or attachment. No answer. I waited, still no answer. Finally he spoke to me.

"You just left," he said, his voice sounding so painfully innocent that I wanted to squeal in surprise. I couldn't have possibly felt any worse if he'd told me he hated me and shoved his blade in between my ribs. A lump formed in my throat.

"I-I know, I'm so sorry," I choked out. I touched his hand but he pulled away quickly, it hurt my feelings even more deeply.

"I waited for you," he whispered, his voice raspy. He seemed to be actively ignoring me, or perhaps he was so wrapped up that he didn't comprehend that I was speaking. "I stayed in that alley, and you never came. Someone told me after a couple of days—no they asked me if they'd had Annie's funeral yet. I didn't even know she was dead," he said in a low growling voice. I felt my lip tremble. I wished momentarily I was still unable to cry. He didn't seem to notice how upset I was getting; either that or he didn't care. "Finally I gave up," he muttered, his voice getting bitter. We sat in silence for a minute before I tried my voice out again.

"My step-dad…he… he let someone kill her in his place… he owed some money or something. My mom… when I came home from school she was ready to leave. I tried to get to you and tell you, I wanted you to come with us, but she said I didn't have time to talk to you. I tried… I tried," I whispered, my voice cracking. I tried to make my eyes show him that I was begging for his forgiveness.

"My dad moved us away after that though, I didn't wanna go…I thought you were coming back," he whispered, continuing as if I'd never spoken. I was absolutely heartbroken. We didn't say anything else.

----

As I climbed back through the window I felt his hand touch the small of my back. I turned around quickly, wondering if he were going to yell at me, and sort of wishing he would so I wouldn't have to last through anymore of his heartbreaking softness. Instead he pulled his hand away too quickly and looked into my eyes, before avoiding them again. "I missed you too."


	5. Soda's Words of Wisdom

_**Chapter Five: Soda's Words of Wisdom**_

**Note: This chapter is dedicated to xfeverx! Thank you very much for the review. Mostly I know what will happen in the very last paragraph (not the epilogue) and the very first paragraph, and maybe a couple of places in between and the rest I think up as I go. **

**Ponyboy's POV**

"Where were you last night?" Soda whispered into Aubrey's ear, as quietly as possible, as he walked by her place at the stove.

"Tell you later," she whispered back, scrambling eggs furiously. I was not supposed to hear this exchange of words, just like I wasn't supposed to see Aubrey sneak out of the window, or see Soda waiting for her impatiently in her room for an hour before going back to bed. Nobody had been paying much attention to me since Aubrey got there. Don't get me wrong, I'm not jealous, but thats how it was. Aubrey handed the spatula to Soda saying, "I have to use the facilities."

"If you sprinkle when you tinkle; please be neat and wipe the seat," Soda called after her. She giggled.

"I'll keep that in mind!" she yelled as she opened the bathroom door. Then she screamed and stumbled back into the wall like she'd been blinded. "Put some clothes on Darrel Curtis! Stop admiring your muscles!" she shrieked with a laugh, closing the door.

"Knock next time kid," Darry replied. Soda came into the hall and pretended to have to lead her back to the kitchen.

"You poor, poor kid," he tsked sympatheically. I laughed.

"I think...I think I'm going to be sick," she said, and then she and Soda began to laugh hysterically.

"It's a good thing I didn't have my towel off," Darry said, coming out of the bathroom. He was now fully dressed.

"Oh god, I don't want to THINK about that," Aubrey laughed as she rushed into the bathroom. For the first time in a while both Soda and Darry left for work with smiles on their faces. Aubrey and I had nothing else to do since it was the middle of summer, so we sat around and watched T.V. until Two-Bit and Johnny decided to come by. This procss repeated almost every day for a couple of weeks, with only small and occasional changes. Nothing much was happening, and most everyone was in a pretty good mood, well except for Steve, who was holding a grudge against Aubrey for some stupid reason.

One of the days we were sitting around doing nothing Two-Bit brought beer over and Aubrey, he and Dally sat in the kitchen and talked and drank for a while until the beer ran low and the guys had to go get some more. When Two-Bit and Dally had left and she gave them both goodbye kisses on their cheeks, much to Dally's drunken shock and Two-Bit's drunken amusement, and stumbled into the living room where Johnny and I were.

"I hate beer," she muttered, popping an aspirin. She was famous for popping pills without water.

"Why do you drink?" Johnny asked quietly. She thought for a second, and then shrugged at long last.

"I like getting drunk," she answered, handing us both a cigarette. We lit up.

"Why?" I asked, thinking of Johnny's fathers drunken rages. Aubrey wasn't like that when she was drunk, she was more silly, like Two-Bit.

"God you're killing my buzz," she laughed. "It helps me forget things, it makes me feel good until the next morning." Gosh, she had the saddest eyes I'd ever seen. "Don't start drinking," she directed towards Johnny and I demandingly. "I don't want you to change like..." she trailed off. I wondered if she was thinking about her step-dad who beat her all the time, or maybe her real father who walked out on her and her mom when she was just born. Maybe the second step-dad who let her sister get killed, or maybe even Johnny's dad. Someone called for her from the porch. I recognized the voice as Dally's. "See you two later," she whispered, putting on a smile that I thought was fake and leaving us in the living room. When she was gone Johnny let out a long sigh.

"I like her. She's an OK girl," he said.

"She listens real good, when she isn't hyped up," I added.

"She reminds me of Sodapop. Always happy, and grinning, and laughing even if she does have her own problems," he remarked. We didn't speak for a while, we didn't have to. The 'new' feel we'd had the first week she'd been there was worn off and we all felt like she'd been living with us forever.

**...Soda's P.O.V...**

I sat there for a while, trying to fill the gas tank without actually paying attention to it. I was paying more attention to the radio playing from beside me. I barely even noticed when a nice T-Bird pulled up, but when I realized it was Buck Merrill's I directed my attention to it. Dally got out of the car and went into the store, he didn't notice me, but the girl who got out beind him did. She turned to face me, and waved with a smile. It was Aubrey. I waved back, not noticing when the gas tank overflowed. She giggled, and followed Dally into the store. The two came out with beer, Dallas had a scowl on his face that seemed to make the summer air cold around him. Aubrey didn't seem to mind as she helped him put the beer in the back seat.

I didn't like her driving with him and Sylvia, or who I assumed was Sylvia, especially when Dally was obviously drunk and in a dangerous mood. But I knew Aubrey could handle him if anyone could. She was smart, and unlike Ponyboy she used her head for common sense. After sufficiently convincing myself that Aubrey wouldn't end up drunk and in a gutter, Dallas could respect people's cousins even if they did seem like one of the boys, I started a long-winded apology to the owner of the gas tank I'd overflowed.

**...Aubrey's P.O.V...**

Dally's lapse in tough attitude had fallen behind us, and sometimes I wondered if I'd ever had that moonlit conversation with him or if I dreamed it up. At the moment he was driving Buck's T-Bird like he owned it, _and_ the street we were driving down. He was drinking, hell so was I, and I hoped vaguely that the fuzz would leave us alone for the night. I didn't want to go to jail on that kind of night, plus Darry would have an anurism. It was nice driving around, but Sylvia was on my last nerve. I did NOT like that girl in the least. "Interested in Buck's party?" Dally questioned. It took me a second to realize he was talking to me.

"I am," Sylvia said, twirling her hair and winking at Dally.

"Sure," I answered, I could use a little excitement, and a party would get my adrenaline going.


	6. Aspirin, Please?

_**Chapter Six: Aspirin Please**_

**Note: This chapter is dedicated to ActChick13! Thank you for the lovely review. Hehe, poor poor Johnny. He is just too easy to manipulate. **

**Pony's POV**

Aubrey stumbled into the kitchen, her eyes were bleary and she was holding her head. It was obvious that she was either drunk or hung over. Aubrey was a big drinker, she wasn't too big on beer but she loved liquor. Usually she had the common sense to stay away from Darry when she was boozed up though. "I need an aspirin," she almost moaned as she reached the counter. Darry handed her one and then saw her bloodshot eyes and smelled the whiskey on her breath.

"Are you drunk?" he questioned angrily, throwing a dirty knife into the dishwater.

"No," Aubrey answered with a bleak smile, I wondered who she was trying to kid, she obviously was, "I'm hung over," she finished, swallowing the aspirin with no water again and taking a couple more out of the bottle and downing those too. Soda stared at her, giving her a SHUT UP look. Darry hated smoking, but he absolutely would not tolerate any of his siblings (and he included Aubrey in this) to drink, especially at the house.

"Don't you EVER come in here drunk, or hung over, again! You hear me?" he yelled. Aubrey just shrugged his anger off.

"Who's gonna stop me?" she retorted bitterly.

"I thought you'd stay away from alcohol with the way your old man beat you when he was drunk!" Darry shouted, instantly realizing that he'd gone too far, but he wouldn't back down now, he was too stubborn. Her eyes instantly went wide with pain.

"I don't have to take this," her voice shook and it was hoarse like she hadn't used it in a while.

"Well move on out then!" Darry roared.

"I WILL!" she shouted back, her voice losing all signs of hoarseness. She turned and sprinted out of the door and Soda ran after her.

"Aubrey!" he yelled through the open doorway, but she kept going. He turned back to us. "Darry, you went too far then." His hands were shaking; I hadn't seen him angry in a while. He collapsed into a chair at the table.

"She has no goddamn business drinking," Darry answered, I could tell how angry he was by the way he spat that sentence out, especially with him using curse words.

"I know she doesn't; it's no reason to mention her old man though. It isn't a reason to kick her out without a warning either," Soda screamed, jumping up from the seat and knocking it back against the fridge. I was shocked. I hadn't heard him yell in a long time either. "Now she might leave and move in with Dally or Steve or something," he worried, his voice dropping down a few notches. I wondered vaguely how she would move in with Dally, since he usually stayed with anyone he could.

"She'd move in with Two-Bit first," I remarked, regretting having said anything when Darry and Soda both turned to look at me.

"What?" they both asked.

"Two-Bit," I answered. I said this without meaning to, but I knew I was right. "She's been talking to him a lot lately. You're always too tired," I directed towards Darry. "And you've got your job" I told Soda. "She thinks Johnny has enough problems as it is to bother him with her problems too. Steve won't speak to her, Dally and she aren't the same as they used to be, and I guess she thinks I'm too much of a kid to trust me."

"Why did I spend so much time at work?" Soda asked, but Darry spoke too.

"TWO-BIT listened?" he asked incredulously.

"She said he understood her," I whispered, my voice becoming quieter.

"That's no reason for her to move in with him though…unless… are they doing something else?" Soda asked. I felt uncomfortable as I thought back to the night at the Nightly Double where she and Two-Bit got drunk and made out while Johnny and I tried to ignore them by watching the movie. I thought about lying for her, and I would've if it had been anyone but Soda asking. I told him about the night at the movies.

"Why Two-Bit?" Darry asked, a bit disgustedly. Both Soda and I turned to glare at him. We didn't see how this was relevant, especially since Two-Bit was one of our buddies and it was better for her to be spending time with him than Tim Shepard or someone as wild as him.

"At least Two-Bit'll treat her OK," Soda muttered, saying my feelings exactly, "but I can't believe she didn't tell me," he continued.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Darry asked, turning on me now.

"You didn't ask," I answered him.

"Well you should've mentioned something to us!" Darry was yelling now.

"Why should I tell YOU anything?" I screamed back, and with that I ran out, following the same direction Aubrey went in.

**Narrator POV**

When he got to the park, Aubrey was there too. She was smoking and sitting on a swing. Ponyboy plopped onto a swing beside her. "Hi," she muttered darlkly, "did you tell them about me and Two-Bit?" she asked with a sigh. He was surprised, how did she know?"

"Yeah… I'm really sorry," Ponyboy answered her.

"It's OK, I would've told on me too... Darry's pretty hard on you eh Pony?" she asked. He thought about defending Darry, but he just nodded instead. Why should he defend Darry when Darry obviously didn't care about him? "He loves you a lot kid," she told him pointedly. It was like she contradicted his thoughts. Ponyboy wondered how she could be so mad at Darry, yet talk so kindly about him. It wasn't how he remembered Aubrey at all; he remembered her having a temper more violent than Steve's. She changed the subject again, "With me and Two-Bit it's not like—that--- you know?" she questioned. "It's just a lot of hanging out, getting drunk, and then making out," she said, throwing her cigarette down. "We haven't been doing anything...anything else." The bitterness in her manner reminded me of Dally. "He told me if Darry got too bad I could move in with him," she took a giant push and began to swing. "I don't want to unless it gets really bad though. I love all three of you to pieces and I don't want to lose you all to a stupid argument between me and Darry. Plus, I don't want Darry to beat Two-Bit to death," she said with a small smile. All resemblances to Dally were lost. I was surprised; she was the first person to open up to me in a while. I didn't say anything, but she seemed to know that I understood anyway. "So I guess Soda's mad at me for not telling him?" she asked.

"He's not mad just…" Ponyboy started.

"Disappointed?" she finished. Ponyboy nodded. She let out a huge sigh. "I'm cooled off a little now, I think I'll go make peace," she told Pony. "You coming?" she asked. He shook his head. She ruffled his hair affectionately. "You're a good listener, just like Soda," she said with a smile, and then she walked off. When she was almost out of the park she turned and turned to him and yelled, "Thanks for taking up for me Pony." Ponyboy smiled, Aubrey was an OK girl.


	7. Obituary

_**Chapter Seven: Obituary**_

**Note: This chapter is dedicated to kerricarri! I'm obsessed with the Outsiders. I've read it at least six times. I'm really glad that you enjoyed it that much. That's one of my favorite things to do with the character relationships. Most people get impatient with my constant relationship and character building. I'm sorry about my cliff hangers! I hate them too, but when you get to the end of the chapter is just makes you feel _powerful_ to leave people hanging. Thanks for the nice, long reviews. **

…**Aubrey's P.O.V….**

I walked back home with my hands jammed in my pockets. It seemed weird to call the place _home_, but it felt good in a way too. I was almost bent over double trying to protect myself from the harsh, cold winds. _How could it be so cold in the middle of the summer?_ I wondered. I knew I would have to go home and make peace with Darry. At the moment I was feeling a bit more sober than I had been earlier, probably _because _of what I was going to do. When you're trying to talk some sense into an apoplectic Darry, you might as well write up your will and pass it out to your relatives. My head was throbbing, despite taking four aspirins no more than an hour earlier. Finally I managed to reach the door to the house.

I opened the door and looked in cautiously. Soda turned his head when I walked in. "Aubrey!" he said croakily.

"Hey," I mumbled, fumbling with the pack of cigarettes I was trying to stuff into my pockets. "Where is Darry?" I wondered out loud.

"Trying to finish getting ready. He has work in an hour and a half, he's in his room though, headache," he informed me. I smiled a little, I figured Ponyboy and I had been 90 percent of what was wrong with him.

"I better go make peace," I said. Soda smiled a little and pretended to be playing funeral music on an invisible organ. I patted his head affectionately and walked down the hall, feeling like I was walking down the aisle to my own funeral. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't afraid of Darry in the least. I'd known Darry my whole life and could honestly say he wasn't intimidating to me, but if he got angry there was no telling what kind of terrible things he'd say. I couldn't stand being talked bad to. You could hit me, beat me until I'm black and blue but as long as you don't hurt my feelings I'll be OK. Finally I reached the end of the hallway.

"Darry?" I whispered, softly rapping on the door. He didn't say anything for a second.

"Yeah?" he asked gruffly.

"Can I come in sweetie?" I asked gently. I regretted calling him sweetie, but it slipped. I was used to my pet names. Now he would think I was buttering him up.

"Sure," he sounded kinder than he'd sounded before. I walked into the room. He was lying across the bed with his arm across his eyes. I moved towards the bed, and sat down on the edge.

"Darry?" I asked even more gently.

"Uh hmm?" he asked.

"I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have come in drunk… or hung over. I won't be able to stop from getting drunk sometimes but I'll try to keep from being drunk in the house or anything. Its just—you hit a nerve when you talked about the old man," I said in a torrent of words. He removed his arm from across his face.

"I'm your guardian and I don't want you to come home drunk or hung over. If you want to get drunk just stay away from the house and you'll be OK." He told me. I nodded and hugged him tightly. He hugged me back and patted my head. Then I yawned, and curled up beside him on the bed. He looked over at me, then back at the ceiling. Finally I got up and walked towards the door. "Aubrey?" he asked. I turned around to face him.

"Yeah?" I questioned.

"I'm sorry about bringing your old man up… I was mad," he whispered. I was amazed, I'd gotten an APOLOGY out of Darry.

"I love you," I told him, it was the only thing I could think of in my gratitude.

"I love you too," he said as I closed the door.

…**Soda's P.O.V…**

Darry had either killed Aubrey, or she'd killed him. The room was absolutely silent, no screaming anymore. I was amazed. But as I was trying to eavesdrop, Two-Bit entered the house. I would never be able to hear anything then with him there. "Hey Soda!" he yelped, sitting down at the table.

"Hey Two-Bit" I answered, with a slight smile on my face. It was hard not to smile with Two-Bit around.

"Where is everyone?" he asked, inspecting an orange that was on the table. It must've passed his inspection, because he began to pull it apart.

"Aubrey and Darry got in a fight this morning. She went in there to make peace with him." I told him with a sigh.

"She was a good kid. Too bad she'll never come back out of there. I wonder when we'll hold her funeral?" he said, sounding a bit unconcerned. I laughed and he grinned. I heard the door close.

"That'll be Darry, carrying her body out right now," I told Two-Bit. We both laughed. But instead of Darry walking into the kitchen it was Aubrey.

"Hi," she said to both of us.

"YOU'RE ALIVE!" Two-Bit shrieked, throwing himself onto Aubrey and hugging her tightly. She laughed, and celebrated her vitality with a huge hug.

"Yep!" she answered. He pulled away from her and inspected her closely.

"Not a mark on you either. Amazing." He remarked. We all laughed. We were all part kidding, but I think a part of all of us really _was _shocked that she'd made it out alive.


	8. Fling

_**Chapter Eight: Fling**_

**Note: This chapter is dedicated to steves-girl! Thank you and I hope you liked the last few chapters.**

…**Two-Bits POV…**

"Goddamit Two-Bit! BRING IT BACK!" Aubrey screamed, running behind me.

"What if I refuse?" I yelped, jumping over a coffee table.

"I'll kill you **_Keith_**!" I stopped dead in my tracks, and she had to skid to not run into me, but she did anyway and we both fell down. She tried to grab her diary out of my hands but I grabbed her wrists and rolled over, so that she was lying on my stomach, facing me.

"I'm sorry, what did you call me?" I asked her.

"I called you Keith" she said, giggling and cuffing me lightly on the shoulder.

"That's what I THOUGHT you called me," I replied. She grinned.

"What are you going to do about it?" she asked me.

"SODA!" I yelled. Soda came in from the kitchen.

"Yup?" he asked.

"She just called me _Keith" _I said, loathing dripping from my voice. "So we'll have to punish her"

"Yeah, we will," he grabbed her ankles, and I stood up, then grabbed her wrists, and I threw her diary onto the carpet.

"EEK!" she screamed as we carried her out into the yard and started swinging her back and forth. "THAT'S NOT FAIR!" she protested.

"I think it is," Soda said with a grin.

"I have no objections," I told him.

"Two against one!" we both yelled with laughter. As we were swinging her back and forth a car drove by, the person driving was staring out of the window at us. He went to the end of the street, then turned around abruptly and drove back full speed.

"Oh god…it's a Soc," Soda muttered. It was certainly a Socy car. I wasn't hell bent on getting jumped on that particular day so I let go of Aubrey's wrists, not as gently as I'd hoped, I dropped her in the grass. Soda did the same with her ankles. She jumped up.

"Run," I told her, but she stood firm.

"I'm not going to run like a little kid. I can take care of myself," she told me bitterly. I looked at her for a second. The car was getting closer.

"They might not even jump us," Soda said optimistically, with a shrug.

"I don't want you to get hurt," I begged Aubrey. She looked at me, her eyes losing a little of the coldness. She was a girl, a pretty girl, and she was pretty good for letting you make out with her when she was drunk. It'd be a shame if she got all cut up.

"I'll be OK," she told me. I didn't have a chance to respond as the car pulled into the driveway. There were probably five boys in the car, a blue Mustang.

A tall guy got out, his hair was jet black and his eyes were a deep brown color. Aubrey looked at him for a second and then threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.

"Aubbs!" he shouted, hugging her. Both Soda and I were dumbfounded; this guy was obviously a Soc. What the hell was she doing hugging him? He let go of Aubrey and then pulled a knife out of his back pockets, advancing on us. "Were these two bothering you?" he asked Aubrey menacingly. Her eyes went wide.

"No Tom!" she said, her voice squeaky.

"Then what the hell are you doing in this part of town with them?" he asked, eyes squinting in suspicion.

"This is the place I've been living. This is Soda," she pointed at Sodapop. "And this is my _friend_ Two-Bit," the word _friend_ stung me. Did kissing at the Nightly Double mean nothing to her? Sure, we didn't go on moonlit strolls, but still.

"THIS is your house!?" he asked incredulously. "This place is a dump. And you didn't tell me your cousin was a hood!" he said. Aubrey gave him a hard slap across his face. I'm sure she could've taken the house jab, but she had a bad temper and making fun of Soda in front of her was like teasing a shark with blood.

"Shut up Tom!" she said, in a dangerously low voice, and then she grabbed both Soda's arm and mine and marched us up to the house.

"Aubrey! I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that!" he screamed after her. She turned to him, gave him an angry look, and stalked off.

After a while the Tom guy finally drove off. The three of us sat in the house in separate corners. Aubrey looked a little dazed and upset. I stared at her from the other side of the room. Finally Soda spoke.

"So that was a friend of yours?" he asked Aubrey. She didn't speak for a moment.

"He was my best friend in Texas, an old boyfriend," She informed us. "I can't believe he said that about you Soda," she whispered. "I'm so sorry" she said with a shake of her head that sent her long hair out in waves.

"It's OK. I guess I do look like a hood, and this house isn't much to look at," he mumbled.

"No!" she argued. "This house is great. And you are one of the best people I've ever met in my life and he doesn't have any business judging you!" she shouted. We all sat there in uncomfortable silence for a few more minutes before we heard the screams. The three of us jumped up off of our chairs and bolted outside.

Darry, Pony and Steve were grouped around a lump on the ground in the vacant lot. Dallas was running up from the opposite direction. The lump was Johnny, and he was bleeding and bruised.

Dallas looked like he was going to be sick and I think I saw tears jump in Aubrey's eyes. Johnny was crying, and shaking. "Some boys in a...a blue Mustang...he had a lot of rings." It was Aubrey's turn to look like she was going to be sick. "I'll kill the bastard," she said violently.

…**Aubrey's POV…**

I ran until I couldn't make my legs move anymore. I had reached the very edge of the Greaser territory by then. Feet pounded after me, but I was too tired to look and see who it was. If I could've caught Tom at that moment I would've killed him. Tom had always been nice to me back in Texas, how come I hadn't seen what sort of monster he was? Finally the feet stopped, and someone collapsed beside me, breathing heavily. Arms wrapped around my waist. They belonged to Two-Bit. He pulled me up onto his lap and I put my head on his chest. Neither of us spoke. We were both breathing so hard that it was hard to hear anything else.

"What is wrong with him?" I asked after a while. I was so confused and hurt, and out of breath that I could barely say the words. Two-Bit didn't speak, which was a first for him.

"He's a Soc" he managed to whisper.

"Back in Texas …I didn't realize he was a Soc. He didn't seem Socy to me. We didn't have Socs and Greasers," I said into his chest, which produced a muffled version of the words that left my lips. He rubbed my hair gently, but didn't say anything. I wondered for a second why the hell everyone seemed to turn up in Tulsa; me, Dally, Tom, but I let the thought go. After a while I was a little worried that he wasn't speaking. "Two-Bit?" I asked.

"Yeah?" he mumbled.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked him. He shook his head, but I didn't believe him. I tried to think back to something I may have said. Then it hit me, _'This is my friend Two-Bit'_ but he couldn't possibly be upset about that. Could he? I looked up at his face, staring into his eyes. "I'm sorry I called you my friend earlier Two-Bit" I whispered. He shrugged it off.

"I didn't notice" he said, but I could tell by the way he said it that he was relieved a little.

"We're more than just friends but Tom wouldn't understand…" I told him.

"Wouldn't understand how you could want to be with someone like me?" he asked. I bit my lip, the words stung.

"No, Two-Bit" I started, but he stopped me.

"Forget it," he said. He stood up, and then gave me his hand to help me up. We walked in silence for a long time, until we were almost to the house; I turned him around and kissed him gently on the lips. He stared after me as I walked into the house, and left him in the yard. I hated myself for letting the relationship seem complicated, Two-Bit was for making out, not for feeling guilty about.


	9. Battle Scars

_**Chapter Nine: Battle Scars**_

**Note: First of all, everyone should watch Rain Man. It's great. Secondly, this chapter is dedicated to streetpanther1! Yes, Dally _does _have that whole sexy thing going for him. I find nothing mushy about sex. I'm just weird like that. I think a kiss is more romantic than sex. Aubrey & Two-Bit haven't had sex, because if you remember at the end of Chapter Six, Aubrey tells Ponyboy that between she and Two-Bit it is "nothing like _that_" or something along those lines. I feel like I'm out of my element when I write mushy things. Thanks for the reviews!**

**Narrator POV**

Aubrey and Soda were sitting on the bed in Aubrey's room contemplatively. No, actually that's a lie. They were both just sitting there staring at the TV Aubrey had "found" the other day. No one had quite figured out how she got a TV out of a store and to the house without anyone finding out, except that it was a small TV and slightly damaged. Anyway, they were watching that when Soda turned to her for a second.

"Aubrey?" he asked.

"Yup?" she answered, flipping a piece of popcorn into her mouth. The two of them would've looked very strange to any outside eyes. Soda was dressed in a pair of boxers and a white undershirt, and Aubrey was wearing Soda's work shirt and a pair of very short stretchy shorts that she'd slept in the night before. Clothes weren't anything big to either of them. Ponyboy and Darry were always dressed, but Soda and Aubrey couldn't care less if they tried.

"Do you love Two-Bit?" he asked her. It was during a commercial break, and he flipped the TV off so that she would answer him. She paused for a moment, and chewed some popcorn thoughtfully.

"I guess," she mumbled. He raised an eyebrow.

"You guess?" he questioned with a small laugh.

"Yeah, I do," she said after a second.

"Are you going to marry him?" he asked.

"He hasn't asked me!" she said with a grin. Soda smiled and shook his head, sending his blonde hair over his shoulder. Just a couple of months ago it had been almost brown, but the sun had bleached it.

"If he did ask you today, would you marry him?" he asked her, taking a handful of the popcorn. She thought for a long moment.

"No" she answered with a shrug. He was a little stunned.

"Why not? Because you're too young?" he asked after he had recovered himself.

"No. Not too young but I just don't want to marry Two-Bit" she said with an off-wards glance at the door like she was dying to get out of the room and stop the grilling questions.

"I thought you loved him?" he murmured.

"I do love him. I just…I don't know." She mumbled.

"Do you love someone else?" he asked, taking her chin in his hands and looking into her face.

"Maybe. I don't know, I'm confused. But it doesn't matter. It's kind of like...like...I love Two-Bit but I love the rest of you guys too. It's different, but it's..."she stopped abruptly.

"Is it that Tom guy? Do you love him?" he asked after a second.

"No," she said pulling away from Soda quickly.

"Then who is it?" he asked her, pleadingly.

"Its Dallas" Darry said, walking into the room.

"What?" they both asked looking over at him. He hung a jacket up in the closet and turned to face them.

"Don't pretend it isn't. You love him Aubrey. I bet you all were more than just friends in New York. You're sure you love him, but you're confused because he doesn't seem to love you anymore." Darry said, as if telling her her own life story. "He probably didn't even act like he loved you in New York but you took that male attitude for your advantage..."

"Is that right Aubrey?" Soda asked, a look of puzzlement on his face. She shrugged.

"I just need a little bit of time to get over him, that's all," she mumbled, not denying it, "I don't wanna date him or anything. I just need to get over him." And she stood up, beginning to walk out of the room.

"Aubrey?" Darry asked, she turned to face him. He had a slight smile on his face. "I think he loves you, or he at least used too, he's just too cold to show it. He won't treat you right either Aubrey, he's got a reputation," he told her. She bit her lip.

"I'm gonna take a walk" she whispered, leaving the door open as she pulled on a pair of Soda's jeans over her shorts, and went out of the house.

Ponyboy and Johnny were sitting on the porch, smoking and staring at the rapidly fading sunset.

"Hey," Johnny said, looking up at her as she stumbled down the steps.

"Hey Johnnycake," she whispered back. Ponyboy stared at her, but didn't say anything. She kept walking down the road, and Johnny stood up after a minute.

"I'm gonna go follow her," he told Ponyboy. "She's not alright" he said, walking behind her. Ponyboy just gave a slight nod.

Johnny followed her for almost a block before he caught up with her. Her hair was a mess, and she wasn't wearing make-up, and surprisingly she looked a lot better than she did with make-up.

"Going home Johnny?" she asked after a second. Johnny shook his head, he didn't talk much.

"No. Following you," he said after a second. She grinned.

"At least you're honest. I'm OK. I'm not going to throw myself off of a bridge or anything" she told him reassuringly. "I'm not even upset, there is no reason to be upset," she said, the last sentence leaving her mouth in a harsh tone. Johnny jumped.

"You don't seem upset," he said wryly. She smiled.

"I'm sorry Johnnycake. It's just…Darry just said some stuff and I didn't think it was true but the more that I think about it I know it is, and I don't want it to be true." She told him. He nodded, he understood what she was saying somehow. The two of them walked alone in silence for a long time before they finally doubled back and headed back to the house. "Thanks Johnny, you're a great listener" she told him when they began to part ways, she patted him on the back gently.


	10. Back to School

_**Chapter Ten: Back to School**_

**Note- I was sitting here thinking "If I was Aubrey what would I want to happen next?" Answer to question: For Dally to somehow loosen up and love her back and show it, and for her to feel no remorse for going to Dally instead of Two-Bit. But that isn't possible if I'm going to treat her like a real person & keep everyone in character. I have an ending in my head already, and it isn't what I want to do but I think it'll turn out OK. This chapter is the transition chapter and the rest will follow the pattern I put out in this one. This chapter is dedicated to MamaCes! Thank you very much for the review. I'm sorry about the lack of commas, most of those places had a "dot dot dot" in there, and they wouldn't let me use them. I've read some of your stories and they are amazing. Thanks again.**

**Aubrey's POV**

"Is that the brunette I saw Two-Bit Matthews with the other night at the Drive-In?" I heard a female voice ask from the opening of a classroom to the left of me. I pulled the backpack onto my shoulder further, and waited to hear the answer.

"Yeah. I couldn't believe my eyes!" Another girl laughed. It wasn't until then that I saw the people talking; two blonde girls standing in the English classroom. They were both wearing heavy make-up especially around the eyes, and leather jackets. I couldn't help myself, so I walked into the room.

"Sorry, couldn't help but overhear. Who is Two-Bit Matthews?" I asked, in my most polite voice. It was my first day of school, nobody was used to me yet, nobody knew me.

"Two-Bit Matthews is the biggest jerk I've ever met in my life! But he is hilarious!" the first blonde said with a giggle. The second one chew her bubblegum hard.

"Yeah, he's that kid with the Mickey Mouse shirt on. You'll see him by the end of the day, he cuts class all the time so if you're in the hallway you might catch him." The other one remarked.

"I'll keep an eye out for him" I said, taking a seat as the rest of the class began to file in.

"Could've sworn that was her..." one of the girls whispered to the other before sitting down.

This wasn't the first time I'd heard someone talking about one of my friends. Just an hour before I'd heard someone talking about Ponyboy. He had moved up a grade and looked too young for high school; I was a little upset to find out that people in Tulsa gossiped as much as the people back in Austin.

I tapped my pencil on my desk thoughtfully, trying to ignore the drone of the teacher. He wasn't so bad; he was actually a pretty good teacher. I just wasn't in the mood to listen much that day. It was hard going to a new school, especially when you didn't know where you were going most of the time. Johnny had been helping me out most of the day to get to my classes. I hadn't seen Dally at all, and guessed that he'd dropped out even though I didn't know for sure.

Sodapop had shocked us all that morning when he announced he wasn't going back to school, and that he'd dropped out. It had been really terrible for me; I didn't know how I'd manage to get through a whole year in this Tulsa school without my partner in crime. Darry had been so angry I'd given him a neck massage in hopes it would stop him from having an aneurysm or something like that.

As I was daydreaming the bell rang, and I gathered up my books to head out of the classroom. It was time for lunch and I was going to get out of there as soon as I got the chance. I didn't exactly know where we were going to meet; I just knew that we would. I also didn't know where we would go for lunch, but I didn't have time to wonder because Johnny was standing outside of the door waiting for me.

"Hey Johnny," I said smiling brightly. He just smiled back gently, and led me down to the parking lot where Two-Bit and Steve were standing beside a car. It was Two-Bit's and it was a mess. I wondered when the last time he'd cleaned it was. We hadn't been waiting for a full minute when Ponyboy ran out to join us.

"How is your first day so far kiddo?" Two-Bit asked me. I shrugged.

"It's OK I guess," I said, having to walk by Steve to get into the car. Steve of course, ignored me like he normally did. He hadn't said a word to me since I was 14. It had been so long I wasn't even sure what he was angry about anymore.

I slid in behind Steve on the passenger's side and Johnny and Ponyboy got in the other side.

"Anybody been giving you trouble?" Two-Bit asked, revving up the car and then turning to face the three of us in the backseat. Johnny shook his head, and so did Ponyboy and I but I could tell Ponyboy was lying.

"What's wrong?" I whispered into his ear when Two-Bit turned around. He just sighed.

"Some kids were making fun of me, and Soda," he whispered back. I winced. Ponyboy adored Soda as much as I did, probably a little bit more if that was possible.

--

We arrived at a little corner store shortly after and Steve and Johnny disappeared into the store. It probably took Johnny to help him because if it hadn't been for Johnny, Steve would've accidentally forgotten me.

"Why does Steve hate me?" Ponyboy said quietly. I looked at him sharply.

"At least he talks to you," I snorted. Ponyboy looked at me sheepishly.

"I'm sorry," he remarked.

"No problem," I said, lighting a cigarette.

"He doesn't hate either of you. He's just angry at Aubrey for something he doesn't even remember anymore, and he thinks that Ponyboy tags along too much," Two-Bit said, trying to clear it up a little bit for the two of us. It didn't exactly work; even I couldn't hold a grudge for 3 years!

…**A Couple of MONTHS Later…**

On my way home from school, I was thinking only about lying down on the couch and sleeping for a while. I'd been working hard to keep my grades up, staying after and everything. If it hadn't been for Darry I probably wouldn't have, but he was on my back day and night trying to get me to study hard so I could try to get into college.

While I was walking, and drawing nearer to the house I could see a car, a red Corvair by the looks of it, by the vacant lot. As I drew nearer I noticed that they were talking to Ponyboy? No threatening him. I ran into the house when I was close enough and said breathlessly, "YOU GUYS! SOME SOCS HAVE PONYBOY!" I screamed. Immediately a group of teenage boys flung themselves towards me, running past me and down the steps. I reached the vacant lot as the group of Socs fled into their car. Dallas threw rocks at them, and the rest of us chased them while Darry and Soda tried to talk to Ponyboy.

The boys turned to see if Ponyboy was alright, but I stood back for a moment before walking into the group, Dallas was asking if anyone wanted to go to the Nightly Double with him.

"Me and Johnny will go," Ponyboy was answering.

"I'll go," I said. Dally smiled at me harshly.

"More reason for me to check in on you all then," Two-Bit said playfully. We all began to walk back to the Curtis house, and I looped my arm over Ponyboy's shoulders.

"You OK kid?" I asked him gently. He nodded his head.

"I'm alright," he said, his voice was a little quaky, and he was shaking a little but the cigarette in his mouth was beginning to calm him down. "Thanks for getting help," he mentioned.

"No problem," I whispered, playing with his hair.

Author's Notes- From here on out it'll pretty much follow the book, but the events will be rather twisted I'm afraid. But if I was going to follow the book I would've written the same thing S.E. Hinton did, and who needs that? Thanks for all of the reviews loves, especially those with suggestions for me.


	11. Normal Kids

**Author's Note- Sorry it took a while. I've been busy.**

**Disclaimer- Don't own the Outsiders.**

**Dedication- not-that-kinda-gurl! Well, thank you very much and I hope you like the newest installments.**

**Contact Info- See the profile. Reviews are the best though.**

**Story-**

_**Aubrey's POV**_

"So, shouldn't you be kids be doing something like normal kids do? Going to the movies or partying hard or something?" Two-Bit's mother asked us as she reached over my head to grab a coat off of a peg by the door. I laughed and Two-Bit smiled at her.

"We're just boring," I told her. She shrugged her coat onto her shoulders.

"Well, if you want to go out or anything feel free. I have to go to work or I'd hang out with you all," she told us, more me than Two-Bit though because he really was paying more attention to the television than to his mother.

"Yeah mom, that would be great. A dream day, two nags in one room nagging me together," he said with a laugh. His mother and I looked at each other slyly and then at the same time we pounced on him, tickling him. He giggled, yes GIGGLED, and scurried away from us. Finally when we stopped tickling him we began to speak again.

"Well, I am really sorry to be leaving you all alone here. There is some food in the fridge," she said.

"It's OK Mrs. Matthews. I'll baby sit him," I told her with a smile as I threw one arm over his shoulder. Two-Bit picked up a beer from the coffee table and took a sip of it gingerly, then seeing that it wasn't hot he took a long drink out of it. His mother tsked.

"Well, I'm sure you'll do a good job. KEITH! Don't drink that beer honey. You don't need to drink," she scolded, but he didn't listen, he just drank some more. She shook her head and smiled brightly. Ponyboy had once told me that Two-Bit's mom would let him get away with murder and I started believing it then. With that she grabbed her keys and headed out of the house.

"So, what do you want to do?" he asked when her car had left the driveway. He handed me the beer, I sniffed it gingerly but then handed it back.

"I don't want to get so drunk that I can't see straight tonight," I muttered.

"Ah, you're no fun," he told me with a grin, and he began to walk down the hall. I followed him. He stuck his head in one of the rooms down the hall and I followed suit. There was a little girl asleep on a bed in there.

"Your sister?" I asked him. He nodded.

"I thought she was gone," he said with a shrug.

"She's cute. How old is she?" I asked him.

"I'm sorry; let me go get you some glasses. Did you say she was cute? Wow you need your eyes checked. Or maybe you have a thing for gorillas?" he asked me. I giggled and slapped him playfully. He smiled at me. "She's 12," he told me, his expression was sad for a second and then he smiled again. We kept walking until we reached another room down the hall. It was his room and I realized it as soon as I entered.

This room was an absolute disaster. There were clothes strewn all over the floor, things falling out of the dresser, covering the TV. There was a small desk in the room, and a bed, and a dresser, and a nightstand and then a TV and a chair. There was nothing else in there, and nothing else would've fit anyway. I raked some things out of the chair beside his desk.

"Clean much?" I asked as he plopped onto his bed, ignoring the fact that the blankets and sheets were in the floor, and the bed was covered with clothes. He tilted his head to the side thoughtfully.

"Nope," he said finally and he laughed loudly. I laughed too. I loved how he could make himself laugh with nothing. He placed his beer beside the bed and flipped the TV on. I adjusted his leather jacket on my shoulders and kept doing my survey of the room. "Feeling lost yet?" he asked. I hadn't realized he'd been staring at me until he spoke.

"It's like a jungle," I said with a laugh. He patted the bed beside him, and shoved some clothes off. I stood up and relocated myself. I perched on the edge of the bed and looked in the floor. My expression was obviously pretty funny because he began to laugh so uncontrollably that he rolled off of one side of the bed. This of course made me giggle. For some reason, when someone gets hurt I laugh. I don't laugh because I'm cruel, but for some reason I just laugh. When I was least expecting it, he grabbed my arm, pulling me off of the bed and I landed on him, feeling like a Commando as I rolled off, almost landing in the hallway. He took another drink of his beer. At that moment the phone rang. He motioned for me to answer it. "Hello?" I asked the receiver.

"Is Keith there?" the voice on the other end answered, it was a man's voice and sort of familiar.

"Keith?" I asked after a second of confused silence.

"Yes. Is he there?" he asked.

"Sure, hold on," I said, walking into Two-Bit's room with the phone. I held it out to him. "Some guy wants to speak to Keith," Two-Bit's eyes immediately grew stormy, and his face was serious for once in his life.

"I don't want to speak to him," he said, and he grabbed the phone, and slammed it back onto the cradle.

"Two-Bit! What is wrong with you? Who is it?" I questioned. He looked at me, he was angry.

"It's nobody alright," he snapped at me, grabbing his beer off of the floor. I stared at him, concerned, and moved to rub his back. He jumped away from me.

"Don't touch me," he said. I looked at him, a little hurt. I took the beer bottle out of his hands.

"Don't drink anymore tonight. Alright?" I pleaded.

"I'll drink if I want to drink. You aren't going to stop me," he told me angrily. I was confused and hurt. What had I done to make him snap at me like this?

"What is your problem?" I asked him, I was getting angry and I could feel myself getting rigid. Things were going so well and now something like this had to happen.

"You're the one with the problem!" he yelled back, taking a long deliberate drink of his beer. Now I was angry. I snatched his jacket off of my shoulders and threw it at him.

"Sometimes I can't stand you," I screamed at him, and I ran out of the house and down the street.

b …Later… /b 

"You going to be OK kid?" Darry asked me, he had patiently listened to my ranting for almost an hour by then. I wanted to tell him no, but I fought that urge.

"Yeah. I'll be OK once I cool down a little bit," I whispered, taking the cup of coffee he offered me. Soda was out to a ball game with Sandy, Evie and Steve and Ponyboy was at a movie with Dally and Johnny. I remembered vaguely that I was supposed to be at that movie too, but I'd forgotten all about it.

"So, Two-Bit yelled at you after that phone call? He didn't say anything else?" he asked me.

"Yeah! For no reason, he yelled at me! He didn't explain it!" If Darry would have let me I would've went on and on.

"I-uh, I think it was his dad," he told me, his voice was very quiet. I stopped and stared at him.

"Oh god. What have I done? I should've listened to him. I shouldn't have yelled back" I stood up, bent on going to apologize.

"No! He's probably gone by now anyway. He'll be OK," he told me after a second, "you didn't know."

"I should've known there was something wrong," I whispered. At that moment the door opened and Soda came in.

"Hey! We won the game," Soda told us, throwing a coat onto the couch and kicking off his shoes. Then he must have realized how quiet everything was. "What's wrong?" he asked me.

"Two-Bit and I got into a fight," I said, not offering details, and he didn't question me.

b …Even Later… /b 

It was almost 2:00 a.m. and I was so nervous my hands were shaking. I was nervous because Darry was so angry and so scared. It wasn't like Ponyboy to stay out this long, especially without calling us. I wished that I'd remembered the movie, then I'd know where he was and Darry wouldn't have to worry. If I'd gone to the stupid movie maybe Two-Bit and I wouldn't have had a fight. I bit my lip.

"He'll be here," I murmured to Darry, trying to comfort him. I was sitting on the arm of the chair he was in. I rubbed his back thoughtfully. Soda was sleeping on the couch, but he was sitting up. At that moment the door opened and Ponyboy finally walked in.

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" Darry shrieked. I missed most of the rest of the conversation when I fell off of the arm of the chair in surprise, but nobody noticed me in their anger. The next thing I knew Ponyboy was running out of the door and Darry and Soda had such shocked looks on their faces that it was almost comical. Then I realized what happened, Darry was beginning to run out.

"I'll get him," I told them both commandingly and I rushed out behind him. I chased Ponyboy so long that my legs were beginning to burn. Somewhere along the way Johnny had joined him, and they were going way too fast for me to catch up.

"We used to get along fine…" I could hear Ponyboy talking, but I was slowing down and they were walking again. Finally I just stopped, and started walking. They were drawing closer to the park. I spotted the car coming, but it was too late. A blue mustang was pulling up.

"What are they doing here?" I asked myself. Before I knew it a group of Socs were piling out of a car.

"You know what Greasers are?" one of them asked. "White trash with long, greasy hair," I felt a pang of anger in my chest, I had almost gotten to where they were and I was going to hurt someone badly if I could get my hands on them.

"You know what Socs are? White trash with mustangs and madras!" Ponyboy spat back, I admired his spunk but knew instantly that the Socs wouldn't take this well. I was right; they immediately began to chase Ponyboy and Johnny. Soon they had Ponyboy in the fountain and Johnny was lying on the ground. I watched as if it was in slow motion as Johnny pulled out his knife and stabbed one of them. My eyes grew wide, as everyone scattered except one person. I realized who it was then, it was Tom. He pulled out a knife himself and advanced on Johnny. Immediately I knew what I had to do and I pounced at him, snarling. I grabbed Johnny's knife from his outstretched hand and stabbed Tom viciously between the ribs.


	12. Numb

_**Chapter Twelve: Numb**_

**Notes: Everyone should watch The Karate Kid as well. Seriously. Now on to some Q&As, **

**x fever x – I agree about that song! Seriously, he is sexy as hell. And thank you for your insight in the chapter! It was really cool. I can't hold a grudge for very long, a couple of weeks tops. I love guys who giggle!**

**kerricarri- Congrats on the longest review I've ever received! Thank you very much. I love poor Two-Bit. He amuses me! Yeah, it's a problem with the whole switching POVs and everything. Originally I was planning on just staying in Narrator POV the whole story but it didn't work out right, and didn't make it personal enough. I'm constantly off topic. we're on spring break now too! I'm tickled pink because school is making me so stressed out, but I have to admit I'd be super bored if it wasn't for school. I liked the character of Tom at the beginning, and I didn't want to have just one mention of him so I had to do something to get him into the story and the only way I could do it was making him seem really mean. It's also really cool that you got to do a scene! Our teachers are too boring. The spy is Cherry Valence/Valance. I can't spell her last name Yes I have seen the movie. I just got it for myself last Friday actually along with "That Was Then…This is Now" which is also really good. If you want to see a picture of what Two-Bit looked like in the movie search google or yahoo for "Emilio Estevez" and that will be him. Steve isn't Two-Bit. He is Soda's best friend, and in the movie he is played by Tom Cruise. Thank you very much once again. I'm glad you liked the story.**

**Narrator's POV**

Aubrey sat on the wet stones around the fountain. Tom's head was in her lap, blood trickled from his mouth through his open lips. "Aubbs?" he asked, he could barely speak.

"Yeah," she answered her voice hardly above a whisper.

"I didn't want to hurt him. OK? He killed Bob," he croaked. "I should've just run. Why didn't I run?" Aubrey looked around, she saw the dead boy on the ground in a pool of his own blood, Bob, she realized.

"You sure didn't act like you didn't want to hurt him," she whispered, "when you beat him up in the vacant lot," pushing his hair out of his eyes. Ponyboy was stone still on the sidewalk beside her.

"I don't blame you Aubbs," he told her, he coughed up blood onto her jeans and she didn't flinch. She looked at him, more softly. He met her eyes and took one last, labored breath before he died. Aubrey dropped his head numbly onto the stones, and she crawled over to Ponyboy and began to rub his forehead gently in a desperate attempt to wake him up. She looked over at Johnny who was sniffling hard and huddled against the blood covered fountain. She looked down at Ponyboy and saw that blood was covering his forehead. She jumped a little in shock, and felt sick to her stomach. Ponyboy was bleeding? He couldn't die on her too…but then she realized the blood was coming from her hands, it was Tom's blood. Ponyboy stirred and opened his eyes. Johnny turned his attention towards them.

"I killed someone, Aubrey killed someone," Johnny said, his voice full of pain. Ponyboy sat up and looked at Tom and Bob, both dead and bloody.

"I'm gonna be sick," Ponyboy moaned, and Johnny turned his head.

"I won't look at you," he mumbled as Ponyboy staggered off and Aubrey moved towards Johnny and wrapped her arms around him.

"What have we done Johnnycake? Oh god…what did we do?" she asked, her voice breaking, but not like she was sad, just as if she was tired from running.

"Dally'll help us" Johnny said finally, his voice was scared and gentle. He wrapped his arms around her waist and they rested their foreheads on each others. Finally Ponyboy walked back over to them. "We've gotta go find Dally," Johnny said, this time so Ponyboy could hear. Ponyboy followed them as they made their way to Buck Merrill's house where they thought Dallas would be.

When they got there, they found out they were right. Hank Williams music was blaring from the open windows as Aubrey tried to disguise the blood that was covering her.

"Hey Buck," she said as he opened the door.

"Hey hot stuff. What's wrong with you?" Buck asked drunkenly.

"I need to talk to Dallas. Is he here?" she asked him.

"He's in the bedroom, you wanna come wait in mine?" Buck asked with a wink.

"Shut the hell up, and tell Dally to meet me out here," she said commandingly. Buck just shook his head and closed the door.

"Oh god," Ponyboy whispered shakily, "I need a weed."

"I don't have any," Aubrey said back, as she sat down on a cooler beside the door. After a few minutes the door opened up.

"Aubrey?" Dallas called out into the darkness, he didn't sound too happy. Possibly because she'd ditched them earlier that night.

"Dallas," she whispered. He could barely hear her; he looked down to the cooler.

"What is that all over you? Is that blood?" he asked, his eyes widening a little. He was dressed in only a pair of jeans. Aubrey glanced over at Ponyboy and Johnny and saw that Pony's ears were as red as a tomato. Dallas followed her glance and saw Ponyboy and Johnny for the first time. "What are you all doing here?" he asked.

"We just killed some Socs," Johnny whispered finally. Dally looked shocked, as he led them into the house and down the hall.

"Tell me all about it," he said as he motioned for them to sit down. Johnny managed to tell Dally the story as they all sat there shakily.

"And I thought New York was the only place I'd get caught up in a murder rap," he said at long last, "And you actually killed someone? That super-Soc ex-boyfriend of yours?" he asked her, in amazement.

"Don't talk like that about him," she said, her voice so shaky that she barely sounded like she was talking.

"Why not? The guy was a jerk" Dallas said, in angry defense of himself.

"Just, I don't know Dallas. He wasn't like that all the time," she answered him, Johnny and Pony looked at her, then at him, then at her, then at him again as if they were watching a tennis match.

"That's what they all say," Dallas answered viciously as he threw Ponyboy a shirt of Buck's. He picked a shirt off of the floor and gave it to Aubrey because hers was soaked in blood. It was his shirt, not Buck's.

She turned around so that the boys couldn't see anything as she switched shirts. She pulled Two-Bit's jacket that she was still wearing back over it. There was hardly any blood on the jacket, just a couple of drops. Dallas ended up giving them instructions to get to a hideout, and what to do when they got there. The three scared kids got up and started to walk out of the room, but Dallas stopped Aubrey.

"Wanna talk?" he asked her. She stopped, looked back at him and then finally nodded. She was more than a little bit surprised, Dallas wasn't one to talk out any problems, "You two go on and wait for her on the porch," he instructed. "So," he said after a while.

"I can't believe I killed someone. I killed someone Dally, and it wasn't just some kid I didn't know. It was someone I liked, maybe even someone I loved," She whispered, her lip was trembling. She didn't stop to think how weird this was. She used to talk to Dally in New York, but they didn't do much talking since she'd arrived in Tulsa.

"You loved that guy?" Dallas asked, his face becoming stony.

"I don't know, I told Soda I didn't, but maybe I did. I wasn't in love with him, but he was my friend and I guess I loved him as much as I love the rest of you," she answered.

"You still love him after he tried to kill Johnny?" he asked ferociously.

"And I still love you after you have to be such a fucking jerk," she said, her voice bitter and quiet. Dally didn't say anything for a long drawn out moment. He was too angry to trust himself not to slap her. Finally he shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Don't even start _that _Aubrey," he said. "You don't love me now, and you never did, and don't you pretend about it either." Aubrey felt like her heart had just been torn out, if she wasn't upset before that she was then.

"How could you say that Dallas Winston? I can't believe you. I didn't think that you were as bad as everyone kept trying to tell me, I wanted to think you were still the same Dallas Winston that I grew up with in New York City. I was so wrong," she whispered, tears coming into her eyes.

"Well I've changed. I've changed a lot, I've gotten hard and now I don't care anymore. I don't care about you. I don't care about anyone. I've been to prison, I've been through a lot, and I've never needed anyone, and I definitely don't need you," he said bitterly. She flung open the door and began to walk down the hall before he grabbed her arm and pulled her into the room again roughly. He didn't want to, but he wasn't above hitting her if she wouldn't listen, after all if she wanted to be part of the boys he'd treat her like he was part of the boys.

"Let go of me," she said, now she was crying, and tears were running down her cheeks. He felt the tiniest bit of remorse and he swatted it away.

"Look at me," his voice commanded, and something in his tone made her obey him. She looked up at him. "I can't love you, because I'd ruin everything I've got here," he whispered, his voice more emotional than she'd heard it since the second night she'd been in Oklahoma. "I've got myself so tough that I can take anything, and I'm not going to ruin it for _you_ or anyone else."

"I understand, you care more about your reputation than your friends," she said. He was about to warn her about being mouthy, but something changed his mind. Instead he wrapped his arms around her waist, to stop her from leaving before he was done talking, and as if on cue the music from downstairs became slow. The light in the room was dim and a shiver went down her spine.

"You don't understand," he told her gently, maybe the music was beginning to calm him. She felt herself wrap her arms around his neck, without consciously making the decision to do so. The two of them swayed to the beat of the music for a moment and he kissed the top of her forehead. "I'd make it up to you Aubrey, if I could."

"We ran out of time," she whispered as she pulled away from him and fled down the hallway, finally making her way out of the door and to the yard with Ponyboy and Johnny.

Dallas watched them leave through the window, a new wave of anger coursing through his body, but it had a tiny edge of remorse. It was the truth, what he'd said, if things hadn't turned out like they did and if they didn't have to live there, he probably would've tried to make it up to Aubrey. She was a fiery little thing.

**Aubrey's POV**

I was in a daze, confused and extremely shaky as I sat on the train in between Johnny and Ponyboy. Ponyboy was asleep, and his head was in my lap. I stroked his hair subconsciously. I looked over at Johnny, feeling awkward. I could tell that Johnny was curious about what Dally and I had talked about, but I didn't really want to talk about it. Plus, if I did I was afraid I'd choke on the lump in my throat. If it had been Soda or even Two-Bit- Two-Bit! His name brought an even larger lump to my throat. – Then I would've been pestered until they knew all of the details.

Truthfully _I_ wasn't even sure if I knew what _I_ was thinking at the moment, I didn't know what I felt. It was the most curious sensation, it was like my whole body and mind went completely numb. I'd killed someone, taken a human life, and Dally cared about me? Or he didn't care about me? And Two-Bit was angry at me; I may never see either of them again. I wondered about Soda and Darry, would they get worried when Ponyboy and I didn't come back? Then it was like my mind completely shut off and I stopped wondering about things.

Johnny almost had to pull me off of the train as we jumped off in Windrixville. It was sunny, but I could barely feel it beating down on me. Johnny employed Ponyboy to go find directions as the two of us sat down in the tall grass.

When he got back, neither of us had said a word to each other yet. "Are you OK?" Johnny finally asked me as we trotted up the hill to the dilapidated church. I shrugged.

"I don't know. I don't know about anything anymore" I said, and I noticed that my voice had no feeling in it; my voice was as empty as I felt.


	13. Special

_**Chapter Thirteen: Special**_

**Aubrey's POV**

I woke up with Ponyboy shaking me and peering down at me anxiously. I was so shocked I almost jumped out of my skin. "What's wrong?" I asked, his face was fearful.

"Where's Johnny?" He asked me shakily. I looked around, becoming fearful myself before finally noticing a note on the dirt of the church floor. I pointed to it and Ponyboy read it carefully. "OK" he said, becoming calmer. "Are you OK?" he asked me.

"Yeah, no, maybe," I sighed, "I don't know anymore kid. I don't know anything anymore."

"Did you talk to Tom before he died?" Ponyboy asked me, then his face had a shocked look on it like he'd realized he said too much. I felt a terrible pang in my chest and then all of the feeling ebbed away like the falling tide.

"Yes," I answered.

"What did he say?" he asked.

"He said he didn't want to hurt Johnny and that he didn't blame me," I mumbled. Neither of us spoke for a long while. "Tom deserved to die," I said finally, my voice still void of feeling. Ponyboy stared at me for a long moment.

"You don't mean it," he said finally. I didn't answer. Did I mean it? I wasn't sure. "I don't think he deserved it," Ponyboy whispered, his voice was painfully innocent sounding.

"How could you say that? He almost killed Johnny, he insulted Soda and Two-Bit and your house," I said, maybe a little bitter sounding.

"He still didn't deserve it. Nobody does." He told me, seemingly comfortable with his sense of justice. Neither of us said a single word until Johnny got back after that. I didn't want to argue, and it seemed he didn't either. I lacked my normal flare and fire, and Ponyboy was a nervous wreck.

**Johnny's POV**

When I walked into the church I could feel the tension building like a brick wall. Aubrey sat in the corner on a skeletal pew with a scarily blank expression on her face as Ponyboy and I unpacked the bags I brought back from the store. I held up "Gone With The Wind" as I pulled it out of the bag so that she could see it. "You interested?" I asked her and she gave me a small nod and a weak smile.

"Sure," she whispered. When I told them my plans for cutting and bleaching their hair and cutting mine Ponyboy grumbled but she didn't say anything. She seemed to me like an empty shell, it was Aubrey's body but she was gone. The fiery, quick-thinking girl with the quick temper and easy-going smile had disappeared, and this empty shell of a girl was in her place. I couldn't help but think that we got the short end of the stick. Aubrey ended up cutting and bleaching her own hair. She looked like a boy when she was done, a pretty boy, but boyish all the same. She and Ponyboy looked almost identical with the hair cut and dye job. They both looked similar to Soda, but Soda looked more like Aubrey's mom than Aubrey did herself.

Pony and I started "Gone with the Wind" but Aubrey didn't sit near us. She stayed in her corner with the same blank expression her face for hours at a time, only getting up when I begged her to eat something, or drink some water, or when she had to use the bathroom. I thought she was probably listening to the story as we read though, because when we'd finish a chapter and close the book she'd look up at us sometimes.

The next few days ended up going by in a huge blur. Ponyboy and I went out every now and again, especially at sunrise, we couldn't see sunsets from the back, but Aubrey didn't, she was still in that corner. She barely even slept. Finally I woke up one morning and Dallas was standing in the middle of the room. "Hey Kid," he said to me, "God, look at your hair" he laughed at Ponyboy. He promptly whipped two pieces of paper out of his pocket and gave one to Ponyboy and one to Aubrey. When his hand touched Aubrey's though he jumped back the slightest bit in surprise and the paper fluttered to the floor. They both bent down to pick it up and bumped heads, neither of them smiled, they both started cussing though as Aubrey grabbed the letter, or what I assumed was a letter. The tension between Aubrey and Dallas was horrifying.

**Aubrey's POV**

Aubbs,

Oh god kid, you don't know how much you're scaring us out here! You chasing Ponyboy out and then disappearing, Darry and I almost had heart attacks waiting. Then that Tom kid, and some other boy turned up dead in the park and you were missing. Dallas knows where you are but won't say. He mentioned Texas but I'm not buying that. Wherever you are I hope you're doing OK. I hope you weren't the one to kill that Tom boy Aubbs, he may have been a real jerk but I know he meant something to you. Another thing, what's between you and Dallas? That day that Darry mentioned something you just left and wouldn't talk to me about it. Now whenever we mention you Dallas gets all rigid and mad, or he gets this faraway look about him. Kid, you must be something special because Dallas Winston has you on his mind.

Much love,

Soda

P.S. – Take care of Pony for Darry and me. OK?

P.P.S. – Two-Bit wanted me to let you know that he isn't mad at you and he's real sorry about how he yelled. He wants you back here as much as the rest of us. Even 'ole Steve is worried, you must really be special kid.

Somehow I found it very hard to believe that Steve was worried about me as I shoved the letter into my pocket, and Soda had to stop calling me kid. I was 10 minutes older than him after all. Somehow though the thing that stuck in my mind the most was how Soda had called me 'special' twice. Dallas had been thinking about me? Two-Bit was sorry? Oh god, it was that familiar feeling in the pit of my stomach. Utter confusion. How could you love two guys at the same time? That's when I first realized that I loved them both more than just as friends. Two-Bit was the obvious choice, he was sweet and loving and easy-going where Dallas was hard and mean and uncaring, but somehow I kept being drawn to him. Maybe I was remembering nights standing out in the rain in New York City with his arms wrapped around me, or maybe those long hugs he used to give, or the way his voice got soft when he talked to me, or maybe my thoughts drifted to us dancing slowly to the music in Buck Merill's house barely a week before. Whatever it was there was no doubt that I loved Dallas Winston, or I loved the memory of Dallas Winston anyway, and while we were both young and alive I wouldn't give up on him.

"You coming Aubrey?" Johnny was asking me, breaking into my thoughts. I looked around wildly for a second.

"Where?" I asked.

"We're going to get something to eat. Dallas is taking us," Johnny told me gently, touching my arm.

"No. I'll stay here." I told him after a few seconds. Then the three of them left, leaving me alone with my thoughts once again.

Unfortunately this little bit of peace wasn't made to last. Barely 15 minutes after they left a bunch of kids happened to stumble into the church. I was in a dead terrifying rush to get into a back room, as I hid under a pulpit. I sat there and watched the kids play childish games for a few minutes before finally fatigue drug me off into a deep sleep.


	14. Reflection

_**Chapter Fourteen: Reflection**_

**Notes: This chapter is dedicated to digitaldawn! Thanks for the review! Glad you like the story. & now for some Q&As**

**x fever x- **I'm a dorkette too! I've never been able to play tennis, but I'm no good at sports anyway. I'm glad you like the story that much. I know, everyone calls me kid "I'm 3 months younger than you!"

**Aubrey's POV**

I woke up with an excruciating rush. When I opened my eyes I thought I was still asleep, and having a nightmare. Heck, I hoped I was still asleep and having a nightmare because this was terrible. If I was seeing correctly then the whole place was on fire. The church didn't seem quite as angelic as the builders had meant it to be; to me it looked like the pits of hell. Left and right pieces of the roof were falling, and fire was growing nearer. Then I realized with a sickening jolt to my stomach that I was on fire, my hand was in flames. I couldn't scream, my throat had closed up. I began to beat my hand onto the floor, frantically trying to search for a way out, I noticed vaguely that the children were in the corner, frozen as much as I was but then as if on cue they all began to scream, wailing. We needed help and nobody was coming. A beam fell from the ceiling and onto my burning hand, I felt and heard the bone in my wrist crack and I finally regained my voice and I screamed. Then it was if total calmness and peace came over me and my suffering was nothing anymore, and I drifted off into sleep only to be awakened again not too much later as someone broke through the window. Johnny was running into the room, he didn't see me, but he began to get children out by breaking a window, Ponyboy was there too.

"Where is she Pony? Oh god, I hope she got out," Johnny was saying, who is she? I wondered. Then I realized it was me. I tried to scream, but somehow I was too calm to do so. Just as they were about to throw the last child out of the window I managed a strangled scream. They both turned around and stared wildly into the smoke and flames.

"AUBREY?" Ponyboy yelled.

"Get out, I'll get her" Johnny told him reassuringly as he rushed towards me, I felt his arms wrap around me and he picked me up, we were almost to the window when I saw the beam falling as if in slow motion and before I could even give it a second thought it had knocked Johnny and I onto the floor. Johnny screamed in agony as I was too shocked once again to move. Someone was reaching in through the window, and grabbing me roughly by Two-Bit's jacket, and dragging me out. I felt the glass scraping against me and all of a sudden I was landing on the ground. It was Dallas, and he didn't even take a second to make sure I was OK before heading in to get Johnny.

I woke up in an unfamiliar place, I was on some sort of slab, it wasn't comfortable and I was moving. I managed to turn my neck, but it hurt badly. I was certainly moving, I was on a table of some sort. Oh god, then it hit me, I was in a hospital. I wanted to cry, scream, do something but I couldn't, I was still completely numb in feelings. My body was screaming with pain though. Then I saw him, Ponyboy was sitting in a seat, where we were rolled by. He was smoking a cigarette and he was so dirty he was almost unrecognizable. "Pony?" I asked weakly, my throat croaking, he looked up at me. "He didn't deserve it, Tom didn't deserve to die," I said, finishing my sentence just as I was rolled through a set of double doors. I think I saw a smile on Ponyboy's face, and I heard Dallas's voice behind me saying "If you ever pull a stunt like that again I'll kill you!" to Pony. I smiled a little myself, although I didn't think anything was funny.

**Dallas's POV**

Her voice was soft comng through the crack in the door. Doctors sat around me, poking at my arm constantly. I knew I was burnt, but they were making it worse. When they finally left I let my concentration go to Aubrey. I could hear her from where I was sitting, or I could hear her if I pressed my ear against the door, and I was willing to do that if I had to. I had asked the nurses and apparently Aubbs had managed to convince them to let her stay in the room with Johnny. Her hand was terrible, I thought she was probably going to lose it, but her wrist was broken and they'd wrapped up her hand and said it would be fine with time and treatment. Also as far as I could tell Johnny was not talking back to her, I wasn't surprised he was too weak, but she was sure talking to him. She didn't stop for hours, she was like a dam that had just burst.

"How can you love someone and not like them Johnny? Don't you have to like them even just a little bit?" she pondered. Who was she talking about? Two-Bit? No...her next sentence answered my question. "And he isn't even good looking! What is it about Dallas Winston that I find so irresistible?" she asked, more to herself than to Johnny. My stomach felt like it turned a back flip.

Maybe I loved Aubrey, hell, I know I loved her but she could never see it, I couldn't ever let _anyone,_ see it much less her. I had to be smart enough to not get hurt, I had to be tough enough to not love anyone, especially a girl. A girl could ruin a reputation. It was alright to trust and love her in New York City, I was a kid then, but now I'd grown up and I needed to stop depending on anyone. I could take care of myself but all I could think of was that girl and everything we'd been through. The picture that stuck in my mind though was like a still frame, and it hurt my chest whenever I thought about it. I kept seeing her crying, when was it that it happened? I couldn't remember, all I remembered was that I'd made her cry and it was a terrible feeling. A worse feeling though was when she told me she loved me, and I knew I couldn't love her back.

I tried to get my mind off of her, but if I stopped thinking about her I was thinking about everything that had happened that day. Johnny was going to turn himself in and say that he'd killed Bob and Tom both, but we'd gotten back to the church and it had been engulfed in flames. I figured it'd be an easy way to get rid of all of the temptations of Aubrey if she died, and who gave a damn about some kids?

All of a sudden I was brought out of my thoughts, Aubrey had stopped talking and she was crying gently, all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around her and tell her how everything was going to be OK, of course it would just make her angry, she hated it when someone told her that. I mentally kicked myself. All of this thinking about her though had been mostly to get my mind off of what was happening to Johnny. Was Johnny going to die? I couldn't let myself think about it, it was too painful. Losing Johnny would be the worst thing that could possibly happen to me, I felt like Johnny was the innocence of the whole gang. He represented to me everything that I'd lost after all of the time spent in prison, all of the roughing it in New York. In New York Aubrey had been my source of innocence. Maybe that's why I loved her? But she'd lost every shred of it by now, that girl wasn't innocent anymore, and I can't say I didn't blame myself for most of that.


	15. Taking it Back

_**Chapter Fifteen: Taking it Back**_

**Note- I just listened to the song Aubrey by Bread.  I'm obsessed with my characters. Also, that last chapter was kinda creepy. It was my first Dally POV, which was nice, because I'd neglected him and Aubrey really doesn't see people as they are a lot of the time. **

**Aubrey's POV**

"Oh god Johnny, I can't take it anymore" I said, my voice cracking. "Why couldn't you have stayed outside?" I asked him, not expecting him to answer. "If you and Pony had just stayed outside and let the place burn down everything would be OK. If I'd died it wouldn't have mattered. I'll end up some burn-out, on so many drugs and drinking so much alcohol" I muttered, by then I was crying.

"Stop it," Johnny finally said, it was the first thing he'd said since they brought him in the hospital, I hadn't expected him to talk back to me and I was shocked. "You gotta do something with your life Aubby" he told me, barely managing to say it. It sent a chill down my spine though; it had been a while since anyone called me Aubby.

"I can't Johnny; I'm not good at anything. I'm street smart, and I'm book smart but I don't have any talents, I couldn't make it in school or being a lawyer or something. I just wouldn't be happy. I just wanna die, why didn't you let me die?" and I began to cry harder, shaking and pushing my hair back with my good hand. I could feel Johnny's eyes on me, but he couldn't move; he was paralyzed. He took a few deep breaths before he tried to speak again, he was so quiet that I doubted anyone would be able to hear him if they weren't sitting right where I was, I was right beside his bed in a chair even though I was supposed to be in bed myself.

"I'm gonna die" he said finally.

"Shut up!" I whispered my voice husky with emotion. It was really the first time I'd felt anything since when Dallas had told me that he would never love me, god damn it. I hated him at that moment, hatred boiled up from my chest.

"It's all his DAMN FAULT" I shrieked, and I fell back into my chair, sobbing like a lunatic. When I finally looked back up Johnny's eyes weren't criticizing like I'd expected them to be, but they were understanding and soft. "You can't die Johnny," I said, taking his hand in my good one just as the nurses came in to try to calm me down.

**Dallas's POV**

I heard her yelling from my place near the door, she'd been talking about me and I was sure of it. The hatred in her voice was so strong that it was almost scary. Maybe I couldn't love her, but her not loving me was not making me happy. I'd always taken it for granted. Just as I was about to get up and try to find a cigarette to calm myself down a nurse walked in.

"What are you doing out of bed? That friend of yours, the girl, she's going to be OK she just got a little riled up. Probably a nightmare," she said, trying to calm me down, but I was calm on the outside, if not on the inside. Wasn't I? Did the fright show through in my movements?

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. When are you lettin' me out of this joint? I couldn't care less about that girl in there." I told the nurse, putting on my normal façade. The nurse smiled sadly, like she knew I was putting on a show.

"Uh-huh Honey, and I just married my husband for his money" and she laughed loudly, like a schoolgirl. I could tell that it was meant to be a joke, her husband probably didn't have much money from the way her eye make-up was so obnoxious.

"Why would you think I cared about her?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow and then stopping because that reminded me of Two-Bit and Two-Bit reminded me of how Aubrey might stop loving me after all.

"Because, I can see it on your face, plus you sat there and listened to her talk all night, I sat here and watched you." I think I blushed, but I wasn't sure. She'd been watching the whole time! "And the guy who drove the ambulance said that you muttered her name over and over again when you were a little delirious" the nurse laughed again. "She's not that pretty hon, plus that temper of hers is terrible" I felt like the nurse was criticizing me instead of Aubrey with that last statement.

"She's pretty, and her temper isn't always that bad. This damn hospital probably had something to do with it tonight" I snapped at her. She laughed again.

"See" she muttered gently, pushing my blanket back over me and leaving the room abruptly. I shook with rage as I curled up under the blankets.

**Aubrey's POV**

I woke up the next morning abruptly; actually it probably wasn't morning, but more like afternoon. I looked at the clock on the wall and saw that I was right, 3:00 p.m.

"Aubbs?" someone was asking me, as they shook my leg gently. I looked up blearily; all I wanted to do was get a little more sleep. I looked into the familiar face.

"Two-Bit?" I asked, realizing who it was as I saw his eyes.

"Yeah, it's me!" he yelped happily. "God girl, you scared us all to death you know that? I was so worried about you, after that fight we had and everything. I'm sorry I yelled at you," he kept talking and talking. It brought a slight smile to my face; there was nothing to bring you up into a good mood except Two-Bit's constant babbling. Just being in his presence could lift your spirits. I stood up and gave him a one armed hug.

"Doctors say I can come home tomorrow if I do OK tonight" I said, because I couldn't think of anything else. It was funny how words could fail you that quickly.

"That's great," he said with a smile, I noticed that Ponyboy was hanging back in one of the corners. The night before they'd removed me from the same room as Johnny after much crying and screaming from my part, I'd finally given up on it and let them move me.

"You seen Johnny yet?" I questioned softly. Two-Bit scratched his head lightly.

"Yeah, we saw him," he said after a few seconds of silence. "He's in bad shape huh?" he asked. I nodded, telling myself commandingly not to cry. Ponyboy walked over towards us then, noticing that I was holding back tears and I couldn't stop myself as I wrapped my good arm around his neck and sniffled for a few seconds into his shoulder, barely holding them back. He patted my back stiffly, like he wasn't sure of his actions.

"I'm sorry Pony" I told him after a few seconds.

"Shoot, it's alright," he answered and a doctor walked in at that moment.

"Didn't I tell you not to get out of bed?" the doctor asked me with a sigh. "And didn't I ask you not to wake her up?" he said, turning towards Pony and Two-Bit. We all three smiled. "OK, you can have a couple of minutes, but I need you out really soon, say your goodbyes because she needs her next treatment," he said, leaving the room.

"There's a rumble tonight. Did you know about it?" Two-Bit asked me after another few seconds of silence.

"No, I didn't," I answered him.

"We're gonna stomp those Socs" he said smiling at me.

"I hope you do," I said, bitterness dripping from my voice.

"Oh and did you hear what Johnny was gonna do for you?" Two-Bit asked, I shook my head. "He was going to say that he killed Tom and not you! That kid's brave," he said with affection in his voice, and at that moment a doctor came in to whisk them out, leaving a very scared feeling in the pit of my stomach. I wondered briefly why anyone would take the blame for someone else, and then I realized I'd do it for him too. Anyone in the group would do it for me, and I'd do it for any of them, even Steve.


	16. Just A Kid

_**Chapter Sixteen: Just a Kid**_

**Dallas's POV **

The same sort of pretty nurse from the night before walked in as I was about to pull out Two-Bit's knife and sharpen it. It was almost time for the rumble and I wasn't really planning on sticking around the hospital while my friends were out fighting, but who can blame me really?

"Hey baby," I said to the nurse, she turned around and gave me a lopsided grin.

"I'm married kid," she said, I couldn't tell if she was joking or not though by the way she said it.

"I know, can you come over here and adjust my pillows?" I asked her with a smile. She walked nearer to me, and when she did I grabbed her wrist and pulled the switchblade from under my pillow and flipped it open. "Now you're going to do what I want you to do aren't you?" I asked her. Her eyes grew wide with fear and I thought she was going to scream. "If you scream I'll kill you" I warned her in a low voice. "Just let me out of here, and I won't have to do anything drastic" she nodded numbly and watched me stand up and leave.

My arm was still throbbing painfully as I shoved the switchblade into one of my pockets, there was no way I'd get to the rumble in time if I didn't either take a car or run, just in case I could get a car I ran by Buck's house but he was gone. "Dammit" I muttered to myself, as I kept running in the direction of the rumble. It seemed like no cars were anywhere, unless in driveways but there were lights on and somebody would notice if I tried to take a car from right under their noses.

I kept running, and running, getting steadily more tired until finally I reached the place where the rumble was going to be. Just before I'd left though I'd heard the doctor's voice as he said "That Cade kid isn't going to make it, I'd give him a couple of hours at the most and that girl is in there with him right now." He'd been saying. I was set on being back before he died; there was no way I could let poor Johnny die. On my way there I noticed that Buck's car was parked at the place the rumble was beginning to start, but Buck wasn't there, it was like he'd left it there just for me.

When I yelled someone threw a punch, the fight was on.

**Aubrey's POV**

"Don't you fucking die on me kid" I warned Johnny, my voice becoming even quieter with emotions that were tumbling around in my chest. I was having no troubles feeling emotions anymore, in fact I was feeling an excess of emotions. It was starting to scare me in a way actually.

"Aubrey, it's alright if I die. Those kids were worth saving, and you're gonna make it too," he told me, his voice was gentle and soft. I wanted to cry because he sounded so innocent, so childish. Who was I kidding? He was a kid! For God's sake he was only 16! But I don't know why I felt so old at that moment; I was barely seventeen myself.

"It's not alright if you die, I don't know what the guys are gonna do without you Johnny. Who's going to listen to my shit when I don't have anybody else to talk to huh?" I questioned him, Johnny bit his lip.

"Somebody will, you're a pretty girl, any guy'll listen to you" he told me.

"No Johnny, nobody can listen and care like you do." I whispered, close to tears. "Only Soda and he's so busy." I felt like I had to keep speaking to stop the tears. Johnny tried to speak again, but gasped loudly instead. "Don't talk sweetie" I begged him. "You're going to make it through this" I said, my voice still begging him not to die. I took his hand in my good one and leaned my forehead against the rails of his bed. The cool metal felt like ice on my burning forehead. At that moment someone burst into the room and ran over to the side of the bed, I looked up, surprised. The person was Dallas, and someone was following him, it was Pony.

"We won the rumble Johnny! We whipped those Socs" Dallas told Johnny, grimly and emotionally, he seemed to be ignoring me, but I don't think it was on purpose.

"It's no good, fighting is no good" Johnny said, barely audible. He motioned to Ponyboy. "Stay gold" he whispered, and then he died, just like that. It was like the light behind his big black eyes went out and there was no one in him anymore. It wasn't the first time I'd seen someone die, but I'd really never seen anyone die as tragically as this. Somehow him dying when he'd just saved a bunch of kids; it made it more tragic than a murder. I wanted to cry, but I bit my lip, trying not to in front of Pony and Dallas. Before I could say anything Dallas let forth a strangled scream and he beat his fists against the walls, a look of pure terror and pain in his face, and I wanted to make it go away, I wanted so badly to make everything better for him, I was forgetting my own pain. I stood up and walked over to him, touching his back gently. For a second or two he relaxed with my touch, and I thought he was about to collapse into sobs but he turned around and began to run out, I grabbed his good arm with mine.

"Please, Dally" I whispered, begging him like I'd begged Johnny. He gave a short look into my eyes, and his eyes were horribly cold and hard. I jumped back a little bit in surprise, and he took this to his advantage as he ran out of the hospital. Ponyboy was standing near the bed, looking dazed, hurt and confused.

"I'm going after him" I whispered hoarsely, Ponyboy looked towards me and gave a short nod as I began to run out of the hospital, following the rapidly retreating figure of Dallas Winston. I soon found out that chasing him wouldn't be quite as easy as I'd thought, he was driving a car. I was so out of breath that it was hard to breathe after only the first couple of blocks, and I followed Dallas blindly until he stopped at a grocery store. He was already inside and out of sight by the time I reached the door and I slumped down into the wall, falling to the sidewalk in exhaustion and planning on waiting for him to leave the store before I confronted him. Thinking back now I don't know quite how I could've been so stupid to think that he would just be purchasing a few items in the store because when he came running out with a bundle of money, and a gun shot rang out into the dark I felt sick to my stomach and I ran into the store.

"You stupid BASTARD," I screeched to the owner who was standing, holding a smoking pistol in his hands, and then I was flying back out of the door, Dally had bypassed his car and he was running too far ahead for me to catch up on foot so I slid into the front seat of the car and began to chase him, I was in hot pursuit as he came to a stop at a pay phone. Not paying attention I ran into the building. 'Stupid!' I told myself, as I climbed out of the demolished T-Bird. My forehead was cut open and I was bleeding, but I could barely tell it as I searched for Dallas, scared. He was running again, and he'd left the money by the pay phone, he was running towards the Curtis house and the Vacant Lot. Cop cars began chasing him, and I was following the flashing red and blue lights. When I reached the Vacant Lot the gang was arriving from the opposite direction. Cops were piling out of cars with their guns in their hands and someone was screaming in the distance.

"He's just a kid!" I heard the voice, and I gave a heartbroken, and bloodcurdling scream as fire opened up on him when he pulled out a gun from his jacket pocket, and Dallas Winston my beautiful miscreant fell to the pavement. I was to his side in seconds, and I put his head in my lap, staring down at him tearfully. He looked up at me, his gaze making me think that he didn't recognize me, he was sort of blank but he was still holding on. He had a grim smile on his face, making me want to slap him if he wasn't in so much pain.

"Aubby?" he asked gently, so much pain in his voice that I let out a gasp.

"Yeah, it's me" I whispered, "You have to hold on Dallas, you have to hold on," but before the words even left my mouth he was dead, his eyes were vacant and he was just gone, just like Johnny was gone, just like Tom was gone, just like my mom and my step-dad were gone, just like my aunt and uncle were gone, just like Annie was gone. Just like all of the people I'd loved the most were gone and I couldn't help but weep helplessly as Soda came to a stop by my side.

I saw Ponyboy fall before anyone else did, and I couldn't make a sound as everyone rushed over to him. I could hear the cops calling an ambulance, for Dallas and maybe Ponyboy as I sat there in the grass, with the head of a dead boy in my lap, and as I looked back down at his face anger took me over and I realized something…Dallas Winston had never once apologized to me.

Out of all of the things he'd ever said to me, that he wouldn't love me and so forth, he'd never apologized and it made me bitter. I walked home by myself, because everyone else was going to the hospital, but I couldn't take it, I walked back home quietly and alone. I wanted to be by myself forever.

**Steve's POV **

The house was quieter than I'd ever heard it before in my life, but that was because nobody was home except Aubrey, or at least I assumed she was home since she hadn't gone to the hospital with us the night before. The night before brought a painful lump to my throat still in remembrance, but the night before had also got me thinking that I could die at any moment and I wanted to make things right while I still could.

"Aubrey?" I called softly into the silent house. Nothing answered me except the loud creak of what I assumed to be a bed down the hall, I followed the sound to her bedroom and knocked quietly on the door. The normal neighborhood sounds seemed to be muted, and I wished it wasn't like that. I needed noise to keep the pain off of my mind, I was so surprised when the door opened that I jumped back into the wall.

"What?" she whispered, her eyes were red rimmed and there was traces of mascara on her face, when had she had time to put mascara on? I wasn't sure.

"I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry. I'm sorry about how much I've ignored you and not talked to you, because I don't even remember what it is I'm mad at you for. I should've gotten over it!" I told her, summoning as much compassion to my voice as possible.

"It doesn't matter Steve" she told me, pushing past me to get to the living room and she plopped onto the couch. She sounded dead.

"It does matter and I'm sorry," I told her, sounding forceful even to myself.

"Well you're forgiven," she spat at me, angrily.

"Aubrey" I begged her, and she turned her head towards me.

"What do you want from me Steve? Do you want me to just say how much I've missed your company, and tell you how great your apology is and how much I'm glad that we're friends again? Well it's not going to happen because I've lost 3 of the handful of people I've ever loved in a little over a week" she said, her voice high in histrionics.

"Ok" I answered her simply, and she turned to me and gave me a small hug, and sniffled into my shoulder. Maybe it was the fact that she'd lost three friends that made her feel like she might need another one.

"We're forgiven" she said after a few seconds, and we sat like that for a while, both of us thinking painfully on the events that had made this moment happen. "So, how's Pony?" she asked me after a while. She looked to me, and I saw that tears glistened on her cheeks.

"He's delirious, and he keeps talking about Johnny and Dally and bologna, and calling for his Mom and Dad, and Soda and Darry and even you. He has a concussion," I told her. She bit her lip.

"Oh god Steve, I'm so scared we'll lose Ponyboy like I lost everyone else" she said, hiding her face in her hands, and I began to pat her back awkwardly. Just to think the day before I'd refused to speak to her, and now I was comforting her as she cried about her losses.


	17. The Pond of Tulsa

_**Chapter Seventeen: the Pond of Tulsa**_

**Author's Note- OK, so maybe the sequel will be out soon. THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO HELPED OUT AND REVIEWED. This chapter is dedicated to x fever x! I know you already got one dedicated to you, but you were the one who reviewed the most so this is my gratitude. Thank you very much for all of the encouragement.**

**Epilogue- In Narrator's POV**

Deaths barely caused a ripple in the daily life in Tulsa, especially Greaser deaths, so Dally and Johnny dying didn't cause the society any pain or glitches in the system. Two Socs also died soon before the two Greasers, their deaths had more impact on society but they didn't really matter as a whole either. Certain individuals though were mourning their deaths just as much months after, than the day they happened and they would be left with the emotional scars from the events for the rest of their lives. Aubrey Holloway was one of those people whose life would be changed forever. She had originally grown up a Greaser, then a Hood, then a Soc and then back to Greaser but after her friends Dallas, Johnny and Tom died in little more than a week she changed. She managed to get herself into college much under the encouragement of her older cousin, and guardian Darry Curtis, and using a lot of money from her close friend, and cousin Sodapop Curtis when she was 18 years old.

She left for college one windy day, the first tell-tale day of fall in early September. She looked desolate, but somehow she managed to put on a smile for the sake of her cousins Ponyboy, Darry, and mainly Sodapop. The deaths had barely caused a ripple, so Aubrey's leaving was hardly more than a drop of rain in the pond of Tulsa, for if the girl had any friends before the deaths she lost them all after them, well all except for her cousins, Two-Bit Matthews, and Steve Randle. She carried one bag down the steps of the house and into the old truck, and she let her gaze linger as she left Oklahoma for college at Southwest Missouri State University to study Journalism.

Who knew that this wasn't the last Tulsa would see of Aubrey Holloway?


	18. Note

_**New Edition Note**_

It makes me extremely happy to announce the new version of Battle Scars. Personally, I like this version more than the one I posted previously. They are very similar, but I went back and edited some of the things that didn't make sense, including a lot of grammatical errors and the like. I also played around with the characters a lot, so I got different emotions out of all of them, but Dally in particular. In this version, to me, Dallas stays more in character than he did in the previous version. I hope you'll take the time to re-read "Battle Scars" or maybe read it for the first time.

I'm hoping to re-do "...Silence of Forever" soon as well, so be on the lookout. 

If there are any more updates to this story it will be either more notes about how it has been enhanced, or I may add some side-stories (containing Aubrey) to the end.

Thank you for reading!

-Ziggygurl


	19. Alternate Ending

-1**Title:** Battle Scars  
**Fandom:** the Outsiders & my story about it, Battle Scars  
**Characters:** Dallas Winston, Aubrey Holloway (OC) & tiny bit of Sodapop Curtis  
**Genre:** Fan fiction, drama  
**Rating:** PG  
**Category:** One Shot/Alternate Ending (556 words)  
**Warnings:** Blood, blood, blood.  
**Summary:** It's the alternate ending to Battle Scars. I've started writing fan fiction about my own fan fiction.

I was out of the car, not even caring about my cut forehead, rushing after Dallas with all of my strength. The hot blood ran into my eyes making it hard to see but I was still faster than he was. He was bleeding too and I could barely tell if it was my blood or his that decorated the wet cement. I followed as if I were in someone else's body, powerless to stop, just following him as if he were the last beacon of hope in my life. I made it to his side when he stopped. He was reaching his hand into his pocket before I could do anything. I grabbed his wrist, flinging the gun to the ground and I felt something pierce through my chest, just barely above the heart. The only way to keep myself from falling was to hold onto Dallas and I pulled him to the ground as my legs gave out.

-------

It was so hard to see with all of the red clouding my vision but someone was wiping my forehead; sobs were coming from somewhere off in the distance and it took a moment for me to realize that they weren't as far away as I originally thought. Dallas was the one sobbing and his arms were circling my shoulders. I had my head leaning against his chest. The white t-shirt he was wearing was soaked in blood. I coughed and more joined it. He was touching my forehead, softly, brushing away some of the red that was in my eyes. I wanted to talk, I wanted to tell him all of the things that I needed to say because I knew that I was dying…but somehow all I could think about for that first few seconds was the fact that Dallas Winston was crying.

"Dallas," I managed at last. He looked down at me, hot tears falling onto my face from his eyes. "I..." but I didn't want to waste my last words on apologies. "Are you...hurt?" I asked, coughing up more blood. He didn't seem to mind, but his shirt was already in ruins.

"Just a graze on my side from the guy at the store. Shut up or you'll pass out," he said the last sentence roughly, as if he were making a threat.

Threats couldn't work any longer. I tried to smile but my face would not agree to my terms.

"...wh...wh...soda?" I murmured.

He leaned his forehead against the top of his head and his body was shaking against mine. It hurt my chest but I couldn't tell him because I couldn't speak.

"Soda's right there," he said at long last. I couldn't see him. After a second I felt another hand against my forehead. I recognized the touch immediately. I acknowledged that I felt it with a small sigh. The hand, Soda's hand, took mine and I could hear him crying. All I heard around me were cries. The sirens had stopped, or if they hadn't then I couldn't hear them. Only Soda, Dally and Pony were crying, but it seemed like a dam had broken loose to me. It took me a long time to say my last words. I had to gather enough strength to get them out.

"Don't get yourselves killed...any of you...ok?" I heard Soda's laughter through his tears. 

As I died I did not hear a single, "You'll be OK," and that suited me just fine.

**And, a comment from my friend that kind of explains this:**

_Fallon: whoa. like...whoa...deep...real heavy...dude_

_Me: Well, nobody wanted Dallas to die )  
The only reasons he died in the original ending were:  
a he dies in the book  
b I was too proud of Aubrey for her to die._

**The end.**


	20. Random One Shot With Aubrey and Dally

**Title:** If Only I'd Been Sober...  
**Fandom:** Outsiders. Although I only borrowed a character and some names. It could work as original too if I changed Dallas's name.  
**Characters:** Dallas, unamed girl who is really Aubrey but can be whoever you want her to be, really. Also: Ponyboy a tiny little bit & the mention of Darry & Soda.  
**Genre:** Romance (a tiny bit), drama...kind of.   
**Rating:** PG  
**Category:** One shot.  
**Word Count:** 1731. I'm doing better!  
**Warnings:** Blood, vomit, nothing too hardcore.  
**Summary:** He's drunk. She's sober. He's in the mood, she's sleepy. But he's hurt, and she's sorry.

**This takes place sometime during the course of Battle Scars, insert it wherever you want. I know I've left this stuff alone for a while but this is something I found a few days ago that I apparently wrote last year for my writing LiveJournal which you should all check out to make me happy. Anyway, I wanted to upload it but didn't want to make a new story out of it. So here it is at the end of **_**The Heartbreaking Slence of Forever.**_** Please review because it means the world to me )**

"Get off of me" she said, sharply. Her voice was a little icy, like she'd had it sitting in the cooler with her beer earlier. He just smirked, moving less than an inch away from her body. She rolled her eyes and put the keys in the door again, hoping that maybe she could get him in the house before any huge confrontations.

Dallas was drunk, very drunk. He had been drinking for two days, and probably wouldn't have quit yet if she hadn't gone to Buck's with the sole purpose of finding him. "Jesus Christ, can you not stay sober for one day out of your life? Just one day?" she was asking him, but her voice was so irritatingly quiet that only she could hear what she was saying. Finally the door gave in and she switched on a light before pulling on his jacket, and forcing him into the living room.

"Christ, turn it off," he mumbled, shoving his hand up to protect his eyes. She didn't listen though, she was being mean again. She ushered him over to the couch, where the light wasn't as bright and she motioned for him to get to bed.

"Don't try and pull anything Dallas, keep away from me, I'm not in the mood to play games," her voice was harsh, he had moved close to her again. She turned around to throw her jacket onto the chair near the TV, but she missed when something touched her thigh. "Goddammit Dallas, keep your hands to yourself!" she shouted. He smirked again, putting his hands in the air in mock obedience. "Take off your shirt and your shoes and go to bed."

Dallas didn't say anything, just continued to smirk. She grabbed the bottom of his shirt roughly, not touching his skin intentionally, so she wouldn't give him any ideas, and pulled it over his head. While she was concentrating on not touching him he moved close again, this time actually getting his lips almost to her jaw line, but she realized what he was doing and she turned so quickly that their cheeks barely brushed. "Go to sleep," she urged. He just looked at her, smirking still. He was encouraged by his almost-victory. It was pretty apparent that he would not lie down without some manhandling. She had two choices: she could risk touching him, skin to skin, and push him onto the couch; or she could leave him standing there and take the risk of him following her to her room. She figured the easiest way to end it would be to get him onto the couch and make it to her room and lock the door. She reached out her hands, a bit shakily and put her hands on his stomach. It was then that she realized how hot his skin was, almost burning her at the slightest touch. She pulled back slightly, but her hands remained on his stomach. He seemed to wince, maybe her hands were freezing him. "What's wrong with you?" her voice was high and unnatural sounding.

"Nothing, nothing, fought with some guy at the Dingo a couple of days ago. Got me across the back with a busted bottle, I'll be ok," he insisted, but he was no longer moving toward her. She pulled her hands off of him, and walked around so she could get a look at his back. She didn't like what she saw. She was no good at telling if it was infected in the dim light, but she knew it didn't look too good, and it was still bleeding.

"Jesus fucking christ, Dallas," she muttered, and she took his arm, gently this time and began to lead him down the hall to her room. She laid him out on the bed on his stomach and left to get some bandages and some iodine. 

When she got back at first she wasn't sure if he was asleep or not, but when she touched the wound he winced sharply, and she knew he was awake. It was a bad cut, diagonal across his back, from the top right to the bottom left. She rubbed the iodine on it with a piece of an old shirt, and bandaged it up as well as she could. She looked at him laying there, and felt a tiny bit of pity creep into her heart for him. After all, he was drunk, sick, and hurt, and he couldn't help it if he was a guy and he liked to do things that guys liked to do. Plus, he seemed, figuratively, to be cooled down a little, so she decided to allow him to sleep in her bed.

It was very uncomfortable at first. She stayed at the far left, and Dallas stuck to the far right. She could barely breathe from the closeness of it all. So many months, and she was finally getting what she always wanted, Dallas so close to her, Dallas feeling even the slightest bit vulnerable, willing to let her touch him...but in her fantasies it meant something else, and she'd always put a lot by dreams.

----

When she woke up two hours later, Dallas was shivering so hard he was rattling the pictures on the walls. She thanked the lord that Darry & Soda weren't home, because she knew what _they_ would think about the walls shaking and Dallas in bed with her. "Dallas?" her voice was weak, she sounded scared even to herself.

"Mmmm..." he murmured.

"Are you ok?"

"I'm so cold," he shuddered. She touched his skin, it was so hot to the touch that she had to pull back.

"Dallas, you're burning up," she insisted. He shook violently. The sweat was pouring off of him in small streams.

"No...cold," he insisted again.

"Ok, let me get up and get you some blankets," she assured him, moving to get out from under the covers but he grabbed her arm.

"Don't. I'll freeze to death if you get up."

"I'll be right back, we've got some in the hall closet, it won't be that long, you'll be fine."

"I'll freeze," he insisted again. She shook her head, her long hair bouncing all around her shoulders. She laid back down in the bed, and moved closer to him so that one arm rested on his chest, and one rested slightly above the cut on his back. Her forehead pressed agains his, and his sweat soaked through her clothes. This time he barely even had the strength to try anything. One arm did linger too long on the small of her back, but she didn't bother reprimanding him for it. The other hand was tangled in her hair, and his breathing was labored. Neither said anything, whether it was her discomfort or his pain, or if they were both too afraid to do something to end their moment, it kept going on.

----

She was surprised the next time she woke up, she barely even remembered falling asleep. All she remembered was Dallas, Dallas being so close...she looked down to check her clothes were still on, they were and she sighed in relief. If she was going to do anything she might regret, she might as well remember it. Something else was bothering her though, Dallas wasn't in the bed. She stood up shakily, heading down the hall where a pool of light was flooding the floor around the bathroom. She walked in without knocking to find Dallas unconcious beside the bathtub, and the smell of vomit making her almost sick. "Dallas!" she shrieked, panicking, "Dallas!" he didn't move and she ran to the kitchen to dial 911. She hurriedly filled them in on the barest amount of details she could muster, and ran back to the bathroom. At that time, Ponyboy had heard all of the excitement and he was awake, following her into the bathroom. He looked like he was about to be sick when he walked in the bathroom and smelled the vomit, and saw Dallas lying there in sweat, and blood. When the ambulance came, she followed in her car with Ponyboy riding shotgun. Neither of the two said a word the whole way there.

----

Dallas woke up with a jolt, having no idea where he was at all. Light filtered weakly through the heavy blinds covering the windows, and he could hear machines beeping. He could barely move, he was in so much pain. He groaned as he lifted his arm, feeling the wound on his back stretching and sending a wave of pain throughout his whole body. Something moved on the other side of the room but he was too tired to try and see what it was. He didn't have to though, because she moved to his side.

"You awake?" she asked, her voice sounding a little bit muffled, like she'd gotten no sleep.

"Yeah," he answered, his mouth so dry he could barely utter the sylable. She reached on the nightstand and got a glass of ice chips, she picked up with a spoon and held it out for him to see. He nodded. She placed it in his mouth, and he waited for it to melt before he tried to talk again. "How bad is it?"

"Pretty bad, they said it was lucky I called when I did or I might've found you dead this morning," she was wringing her hands, and looking pretty nervous. He laughed bitterly.

"Not too much of a loss." She didn't say anything, but she avoided his gaze.

"Do you remember anything from last night?" she was trying to be noncholant about it, like she didn't really give a rat's ass if he remembered or not. He could tell she wanted him to remember.

"Naw," he lied, patting around his bed for some cigarettes, "what happened that I should remember?"

"Nothing, just wondering if you did," her voice seemed a little disappointed, but she was trying to hide it.

"You got a weed?"

"Sure, but you're not getting one. You're in the hospital for a reason." 'Goody-two-shoes' he sulked.

"I could be dying and you're not going to let me have a cigarette?" he grouched. She nodded. He had the odd feeling she was paying him back for not remembering. It didn't mean anything though, it wouldn't have happened if he'd been sober, and not in so much pain. It never would've happened.


End file.
